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  • And also if a bear is attacking you

    Number of comments: 0
    On the drive home from school yesterday Elle informed Joseph that a boy in her class "smacked" her. I was already aware of this situation and it's being handled but Joseph was appalled.

    "What!?! Why did he do that? Did he hit other kids or just you? What did" [...]
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    Posted: December 01, 2009, 6:53pm EST
    by Jen

  • My new godson

    Number of comments: 2
    The plan was simple. My friend Amanda was going to go into the hospital on Friday night to be prepped to be induced on Saturday morning. I would go to the hospital on Saturday morning to be her labor support (along with her husband (and my cousin) Matt).

    Of [...]
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    Posted: November 30, 2009, 10:17am EST
    by Jen

  • Nice customer service T-Mobile

    Number of comments: 2
    I don't know if you know this about me but I'm sort of attached to my phone. I pretty much always have it within arms reach. Even though most of the time no one is trying to get in touch with me it's exciting to know that at any moment [...]
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    Posted: November 24, 2009, 5:56pm EST
    by Jen

  • The funniest thing I have ever seen on the internet

    Number of comments: 2
    I admit it, I am nosy. I hear about some internet drama and I go sniffing it out. I can't help it. I just loves me some good gossip.

    Recently there was a big dust up with a blogger admitting that she killed her dog only maybe she' [...]
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    Posted: November 23, 2009, 11:52am EST
    by Jen

  • Her real name rhymes with ... nothing I can think of

    Number of comments: 2
    Joseph has a new girl in his class. He kind of loves her.

    The day before she came to the class he told us excitedly over dinner "We're getting a new girl in our class and her name is Sunshine*. I wonder what she'll look like and if she's'" [...]
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    Posted: November 19, 2009, 3:13pm EST
    by Jen

  • Shhhh! It's a secret!

    Number of comments: 7
    I've discovered that a funny thing happens why you lose your voice. When you whisper to people, they whisper back to you. Even if the thing you whisper to them is "I've lost my voice."

    "Oh no!" they whisper back.

    People, it's not Everything Is A Secret Day. [...]
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    Posted: November 17, 2009, 10:15am EST
    by Jen

  • I like you so much that I would read a bad book for you

    Number of comments: 3
    Remember how I am on a quest to meet new people? And how sometimes it goes terribly, horribly wrong? Yeah, I remember that.

    Well, I don't give up easily so a few weeks ago I went to a book club meeting. And guess what. It didn't suck! [...]
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    Posted: November 12, 2009, 1:21pm EST
    by Jen

  • Barbie girl

    Number of comments: 7
    I played with Barbies for a lot longer than I care to admit. I found it soothing to dress them, brush their hair and line them up alphabetically according to the names that I had given them. I hesitate to say how old I was when I put my Barbies [...]
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    Posted: November 11, 2009, 2:29pm EST
    by Jen

  • Why would you even tell me that?

    Number of comments: 8
    I've noticed something odd lately. While most people I know are supportive of me being a surrogate some of them are not shy about telling me about people they know who don't think it's such a great idea.

    In the past few months I've had several people tell me [...]
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    Posted: November 09, 2009, 9:57am EST
    by Jen

  • Private parts

    Number of comments: 2
    When Joseph was little he was, as most little boys are, fascinated with what he had going on in his pants. He wasn't shy about it either. To solve this we intoduced him to the concept of "private parts". We told him those were his private parts and if he' [...]
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    Posted: November 05, 2009, 9:58am EST
    by Jen

  • I hope it's in the shape of a horsie!

    Number of comments: 6
    A couple of weeks ago I took Joseph to the eye doctor because he was complaining about "floaties". Turns out he has the tiny problem most commonly know as Terrible Eyesight. The poor kid has been going around half blind and I didn't even know it.

    Yesterday Joseph' [...]
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    Posted: November 04, 2009, 9:51am EST
    by Jen

  • You noticed me! You really noticed me!

    Number of comments: 6
    Oh! I didn't see you there at first. I've been so busy "sorting" Halloween candy for the last two days that I've hardly had time to think about this blog, much less it's readership. So you'll understand my surprise when I checked my stats and discovered a rather large and' [...]
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    Posted: November 02, 2009, 10:49am EST
    by Jen

  • Being a mom doesn't mean not having feelings

    Number of comments: 7
    Long ago I had a job at a grocery store located in a bad part of town. I quit the job when I got married. Then, a couple of years later I returned to work at the same store, this time as a cake decorator. What I didn't know' [...]
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    Posted: October 29, 2009, 12:02pm EDT
    by Jen

  • It was ... Soap! Poisoning!

    Number of comments: 3
    As I was reading Elle her bedtime stories last night she kept making weird little noises and faces. I chalked it up to her being a weird little four year old.

    When I turned off the light and climbed into bed with her* she started coughing and whining. When [...]
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    Posted: October 27, 2009, 4:42pm EDT
    by Jen

  • Clearly Jesse is wrong about everything

    Number of comments: 9
    My husband and I have been married for over 10 years now and for the most part it's been smooth sailing. We've never had to deal with the issues that face a lot of couple married for 10 years. No infidelity, no major blow ups about money, no significant differences [...]
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    Posted: October 26, 2009, 9:07am EDT
    by Jen

  • Pail style 2.0

    Number of comments: 2
    Yesterday when I picked Joseph up from school he was so excited. He went on and on about the field trip that his class would be taking today. His class has been studying early settlers and today they're taking a trip to a one room school house to see how' [...]
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    Posted: October 20, 2009, 10:04am EDT
    by Jen

  • My textures bring all the boys to the yard

    Number of comments: 5
    I don't want to alarm anyone but it appears I have a stalker. Ok, maybe not a stalker but an admirer. All right, not an admirer but someone who acknowledges my existence. I guess maybe she doesn't know I exist but she at least likes my photography. Or rather, she [...]
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    Posted: October 19, 2009, 1:29pm EDT
    by Jen

  • Speaking of large and in charge...

    Number of comments: 4
    Elle's not the only one in this house who's a great big giant. I have become rather huge myself. What's that you say? You say you need proof in the form of a fuzzy cell phone picture that doesn't show my face and makes my arm look it's twice the' [...]
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    Posted: October 13, 2009, 1:35pm EDT
    by Jen

  • But she's still MY baby

    Number of comments: 3
    Elle turned four yesterday. Eek!

    This child is large and in charge. Literally. Being in the 96th percentile for height and weight kind of gives you an air of authority. If you ask her who the boss is she responds "I am!" in a voice that lets you know [...]
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    Posted: October 12, 2009, 11:12am EDT
    by Jen

  • A very little problem

    Number of comments: 5
    On Joseph's first day of school his class did a getting to know you exercise. They had to walk around the classroom and fill out a sheet that had things on it like "went fishing this summer" and "has two sisters" and "has blue eyes". Joseph had filled in all' [...]
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    Posted: October 06, 2009, 9:44am EDT
    by Jen

  • Because the Beloved Leader tells me to

    Number of comments: 4
    On the way home from school the other day Joseph drops this little gem on me. "Today I told my teacher that you're pregnant with twins. She said that was neat. Then I told you that you're an obedient mother and that you give the babies away to other people."
    [...]
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    Posted: September 29, 2009, 9:22am EDT
    by Jen

  • The babies

    Number of comments: 1
    On Monday my IF's (hereby known as A and D) flew into town so that they could come to my ultrasound. They came bearing gifts for the kids. My kids that is, not theirs. I don't even want to the about the logistics that would be involved with giving their [...]
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    Posted: September 23, 2009, 6:52pm EDT
    by Jen

  • It almost makes sense if you think about it really hard

    Number of comments: 2
    You know that part in the song Man in the Mirror where Michael Jackson sings "And no message could have been any clearer"?

    Until really recently (three days ago) I thought he was saying "And no mustache could have been any clipper".

    When that song came out and [...]
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    Posted: September 18, 2009, 10:00am EDT
    by Jen

  • At least I can still enjoy glee club style medleys

    Number of comments: 6
    Everything I love has fallen into a state of neglect. My kids, my husband, my house, my garden, my blog. I just don't have the energy to do much more than lay around and try to work up the energy to get something to eat. When I try to eat' [...]
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    Posted: September 16, 2009, 11:00am EDT
    by Jen

  • This is why my heart is on the floor

    Number of comments: 7
    I choke up once or twice as I drive her to her first day of preschool. I glance back at her and her eyes are bright and happy. She chatters on, telling me all the things she's going to do at school.

    Clutched to her chest is a' [...]
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    Posted: September 10, 2009, 9:12am EDT
    by Jen

  • Because I'm too tired to argue

    Number of comments: 5
    I was going to write a big long post about how moronic I find it that people are actually planning on keeping their kids home on September 8th so that they are not exposed to President Obama telling them to (gasp!) do well in school and (oh no!) try their [...]
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    Posted: September 04, 2009, 12:06pm EDT
    by Jen

  • Prairie dogs are good for the soul

    Number of comments: 3
    When I found out I was pregnant with twins I immediately turned to the the most trusted source for information guaranteed to scare the crap out of you. Google. I googled everything. Rates of c-sections with twins, weight gain with twins, risk of gestational diabetes with twins, morning sickness and [...]
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    Posted: September 01, 2009, 12:43pm EDT
    by Jen

  • Babies are scary

    Number of comments: 8
    I had my first ultrasound today. It was exciting. It was extra fun because they guys were there so they got to get a nice, early look at their babies.

    Oh yeah, babies. As in two.

    Ack! I won't even lie. The idea of carrying two human beings' [...]
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    Posted: August 24, 2009, 5:04pm EDT
    by Jen

  • Ten magical-ish years

    Number of comments: 6
    Jesse,
    Today is our ten year anniversary. The last decade has gone by so quickly. I remember our wedding day like it was yesterday.

    Let's not let this anniversary go by without marking the occasion with something special. Here's what I have in mind.

    After you get home [...]
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    Posted: August 21, 2009, 2:07pm EDT
    by Jen

  • 40 inches

    Number of comments: 1
    In a few week my parents will be taking Elle to Disney World. If this seems a little unfair just let me point out that when I was pregnant with Elle they took Joseph to Disney World and a year later to Disneyland. Now it's Elle's turn for an entire [...]
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    Posted: August 20, 2009, 10:22am EDT
    by Jen

  • Bad news, good news

    Number of comments: 9
    The bad news:
    I am bleeding.

    The good news:
    I'm not cramping.
    I'm still having morning sickness.
    The blood is not bright red.
    I bled a little bit when I was pregnant with Little A and that turned out ok.

    We'll see what happens. For now I'm just [...]
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    Posted: August 18, 2009, 11:59am EDT
    by Jen

  • Growing up

    Number of comments: 3
    Joseph is nine years old but sometimes I forget. I forget that he's not my baby any more.

    He's still so small. He was the littlest one in his class last year. He's still wearing size 5/6 shorts. His giant beast of a little sister will probably be taller [...]
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    Posted: August 13, 2009, 9:51pm EDT
    by Jen

  • Forever sleep*

    Number of comments: 4
    I am 5 weeks and 1 day pregnant today.

    This is the part of pregnancy where I spend most of my time struggling to stay awake and not vomit.

    I look like I have a case of the swine flu and my house looks like actual swine [...]
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    Posted: August 12, 2009, 3:29pm EDT
    by Jen

  • How did Ma Ingalls do it?

    Number of comments: 6
    When we planted this year's garden we intended for it to be a learning experience. Sure, we wanted to get some food from it but the real point was to learn by doing. And we have learned a lot from from it. Some things we learned are:

    Follow the [...]
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    Posted: August 10, 2009, 12:25pm EDT
    by Jen

  • Sometimes I like to be wrong

    Number of comments: 5
    For those of you who commented on yesterday's post suggesting I pee on a stick are a little late. I've peed on many sticks already. Many, many, many sticks. But we'll talk about my adventures in the woods another time.

    For now let's answer the burning question you've come' [...]
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    Posted: August 05, 2009, 5:30pm EDT
    by Jen

  • What ever could it be?

    Number of comments: 5
    So what's going on with me?

    Not much.

    My boobs are huge and sore.

    I get indigestion every time I eat.

    I am tired.

    I just can't figure out what's going on with me.

    No idea at all.

    Four years ago today Joseph' [...]
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    Posted: August 04, 2009, 2:07pm EDT
    by Jen

  • "Woof" means "I wish the ground would swallow me up right now."

    Number of comments: 7
    "Hey!" he shouted.

    The second it was out of his mouth I knew what was coming. I froze. There was no way to stop it. My boy is an unstoppable force who has yet to meet his immovable object.

    *************

    It all started so innocently.

    Joseph, [...]
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    Posted: August 01, 2009, 8:44pm EDT
    by Jen

  • Rabbit proof fence

    Number of comments: 3
    We have a rabbit in our garden. I've spotted him several times now. Sometimes when I'm out working in the garden I'll spy him hopping from row to row. I'll be weeding the carrots and he'll be hiding in the beans. I'll inspect the pumpkins and he'll be cowering in' [...]
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    Posted: July 31, 2009, 9:55am EDT
    by Jen

  • My most decadent moment

    Number of comments: 2
    I just realized I forgot to tell you all about the best moment of my trip to LA. Ok, my second best moment. All right, more like my third best moment because the transfer was neat and that has to be first and the cab ride was fun so [...]
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    Posted: July 29, 2009, 5:12pm EDT
    by Jen

  • They like fiber in LA

    Number of comments: 6
    Cab rides in LA are always an adventure. In all my travels there I have yet to have a cab driver that I didn't think was actively trying to kill me. My most recent trip was no exception.

    On my way to the airport I was picked up' [...]
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    Posted: July 27, 2009, 10:41am EDT
    by Jen

  • Afterglow

    Number of comments: 5
    I am back in my hotel room. The transfer went well. There was some back and forth about how many to put in as we waited to see how many of them made the thaw. In the end enough survived (with one of them doing a "No really! I'm feeling'" [...]
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    Posted: July 24, 2009, 3:40pm EDT
    by Jen

  • Everyone I know went to BlogHer and all I got was this lousy embryo

    Number of comments: 9
    Right now the interwebs are clogged with BlogHer posts. Who's going, who's not, what people will be wearing, how big their butts will be, what exclusive party people are going to get left out of and have their feelings hurt by? It all gets to be a little much for [...]
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    Posted: July 20, 2009, 8:48pm EDT
    by Jen

  • Great plenty?

    Number of comments: 3
    Jesse says this thing sometimes that always leaves me bewildered and disoriented.

    He says "great plenty".

    As in "Don't get any meat at the store, we have great plenty in the freezer already." or "We don't need to get quarters for the garage sale, I've already got great'" [...]
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    Posted: July 15, 2009, 11:21am EDT
    by Jen

  • The ultimate faux pas

    Number of comments: 10
    Long, long ago, in another life, I was a cashier. It was a terrible job. Mind numbing and repetitive and dull. It was made even worse by the fact that the store I worked in was located in Cracky McCracktown. The customers were an interesting mix of drunks, crackheads, lowlifes [...]
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    Posted: July 13, 2009, 10:02pm EDT
    by Jen

  • This is why I am boring

    Number of comments: 5
    I haven't had much to say lately for three reasons.

    1. My life is uneventful.
    2. For the past week I have had the headache from hell and it hurts me to look at the computer screen.
    3. I am busy gardening and preserving food. In the past' [...]
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    Posted: July 09, 2009, 3:08pm EDT
    by Jen

  • A notice to the general public

    Number of comments: 9
    It's really not cool to give a nine year old boy a hard time about the birthday cake he chose. Even if you think it's strange that he chose a Power Puff Girls cake. Even if you are "joking".

    You can think what you want about it but [...]
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    Posted: July 06, 2009, 11:58am EDT
    by Jen

  • Nine

    Number of comments: 2
    My baby is nine today. I kind of can't even believe that. I can so clearly remember him as a tiny baby. He still seems tiny to me. I guess that might be because he is tiny. Only in size though. In spirit this kid is a giant.

    I' [...]
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    Posted: July 03, 2009, 5:47pm EDT
    by Jen

  • Sometimes Google hurts my feelings

    Number of comments: 3
    Latest search term to bring someone to my blog? "show me the blog of a person who has a weird vagina and is a weird person"

    Sigh.

    One year ago today I hated that damned Dixie paper plate commercial.
    Two years ago today I had some thoughts [...]
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    Posted: July 01, 2009, 2:04pm EDT
    by Jen

  • Yard decorations ..... OF DEATH

    Number of comments: 8
    Whenever I talk about adding something to the yard to make it look nicer Jesse shoots the idea down with "I don't know, I worry about the kids falling and hitting their heads on that."

    I was reading about compost bins (of course I was) and I read that' [...]
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    Posted: June 29, 2009, 3:48pm EDT
    by Jen

  • A really fun quiz about Elle

    Number of comments: 5
    Today Elle:
    a) dug up my rosemary, sage and thyme herb box.
    b) dumped two gallons of bathwater all over the bathroom floor.
    c) locked me and Joseph out of the house.
    d) tried to knock me down the stairs.
    e) slammed Joseph's arm in the door.
    f) kicked Jesse [...]
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    Posted: June 25, 2009, 9:27pm EDT
    by Jen
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