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The Kool Aid Report

  • I'm so glad we had this time together

    Dear KARnies,We've seen a lot of moving about and jumping out of the blogosphere this past year. Foot moved on to infrequent posting at Nihilist, Nihilist to Fraters, Bogus Doug went to Shot in the Dark, King Banananananaiiiiiiian moving around radio stations, etc. As Foot noted early this year, it' [...]
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    Posted: October 20, 2009, 4:25pm EDT

  • Why Men Get Manicures...

    [...]
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    Posted: October 20, 2009, 4:23pm EDT

  • They Hate You! They Really Really Hate You!

    When you're a leftyblog "cartoonist", and even the pantloads at "Talking Points Memo" think you suck......then it really is time to suck the pipe, creatively speaking.Especially when they hate you because you make shit up:this time around, not all speech balloons from Bachmann are necessarily direct quotes from the woman' [...]
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    Posted: October 12, 2009, 10:19pm EDT

  • Bodily Functions - Week in Review

    I realized I haven't posted on poop in a while. Here's a rec(r)ap:ANA(L) airlinesJapanese airline All Nippon wants passengers to use bathroom pre-flight to cut carbon emissions We got your emissions right here, ANA. I hope passengers all enjoy a Chipotle before boarding, so as to clog the toilets and' [...]
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    Posted: October 09, 2009, 10:11am EDT

  • No Favre Hate in KARville

    ...unless you're a Packer fan. Vikes won 30-23. Sisyphus' alert graphic hasn't been upgraded yet, but Pack fans are decidedly in code orange:White-hot Favre haters, feel free to pile on in the comments section. Favre fans, pile on the love.' [...]
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    Posted: October 06, 2009, 7:59am EDT

  • The Official Brett Favre Hate-fest Pile-on Round-up

    It's Monday.It's also Packer/Vikings game day. Foot's been hatin' on Favre ever since he turned purple. For example, his last Favre alert status graphic:As a public service, KAR offers our comments section to vent your burning, white-hot hatred of Favre. Of course, it can also as a clearinghouse for Packer' [...]
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    Posted: October 04, 2009, 11:27pm EDT

  • Landscaping WIN

    [...]
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    Posted: September 29, 2009, 3:00pm EDT

  • 80's Male FAIL

    Holy crap! The 80's. Pitiful, effeminate girley-men:Fred, the Jeffrey Daumerish, geekish Viking at 3:45 wins. I'll look around for the ladies version, where I'm sure their hair and glasses will fill the frame. Eeesh.' [...]
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    Posted: September 25, 2009, 3:33pm EDT

  • Are You Ready For Some Football (on the Oregon Trail)?

    Nice to see others having fun with Favre's retirement status. [...]
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    Posted: September 21, 2009, 11:46am EDT

  • When Things Seem At Their Worst, Play This Video.

    Work advisory alert - but if you have earbuds and your monitor doesn't face the aisle, crank it up!I know I feel much better.' [...]
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    Posted: September 14, 2009, 5:34pm EDT

  • NFL Tip of the Day: How To Stall While Answering A Question

    Update: KAR has learned that Ellis was diagnosed with a speech impediment, so maybe Failblog failed with that one. A couple of friends with speech impediments laugh and carry on when they are affected, so we'll do the same and like um, move on.' [...]
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    Posted: September 14, 2009, 1:29pm EDT

  • Minnesota Reorganization of Bloggers

    Okay. Let's see if I got this "organization" straight: Foot moved to Nihilist in Golf Pants, Sisyphus and Nihilist moved to Fraters, Bogus Doug jumped to Mitch, and Mr. D has turned into a neighborhood. I know I'm forgetting some.To end the confusion, I propose we all move to one' [...]
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    Posted: September 12, 2009, 7:27am EDT

  • Parent-Teacher Meeting Assignment

    Most students I trust made it through their first day of school. I loaned my whoopie cushion to my neighbor (starting 9th grade) so he could punctuate Obama's speech. This Family Guy scene shows an innovative way for parents to make their first PTA meeting a little less boring (if [...]
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    Posted: September 09, 2009, 12:15am EDT

  • Who Was That Masked Man?

    Did Teh Andeeee or the Swifteee get into Betty (Rubble) McCollum's town hall last night?Ahahahahahahaha! [...]
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    Posted: September 01, 2009, 3:28pm EDT

  • Favre Alert Status Set To Music

    Thank you, Elmer. This is brilliant. [...]
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    Posted: August 24, 2009, 7:35pm EDT

  • Favre Alert Status Redesign

    Given the current situation, we here in KAR's Department of Favreland Security have decided that the old Brett Favre Status Alert Level Meter (example of old regime here) simply was not up to the task of tracking the fickle QB's ever-changing moods and deceptions. Furthermore, it's rather confusing, what with [...]
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    Posted: August 18, 2009, 1:19pm EDT

  • Poster WIN

    [...]
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    Posted: August 12, 2009, 1:00pm EDT

  • MiLF 5: The Usual Winners

    Team Koolaid in Golf Pants wins the Millard Fillmore again this year, proudly shooting off small tongues of fire to celebrate.Note the toy lawn mower — that was a housewarming gift for loser Teh Andee. Well played gentlemen - see you on the turf next year. [...]
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    Posted: August 05, 2009, 9:16am EDT

  • Favre Status Update, Updated

    Who else was considered? The PiPress said Favre, Favre and Favre:Apparently, Favre was Plan A, Plan B and Plan C. The Vikings chose not to pursue other quarterback options such as Jay Cutler, Matt Cassel, Kurt Warner or Matt Hasselbeck, among others. They did sign Rosenfels, a career backup. So [...]
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    Posted: July 29, 2009, 7:17am EDT

  • Brett Favre Alert Status Update!!!1!

    Mr. Fastbucks requested an update with the latest buzzword. We at KAR (a skeleton crew of 1 now, I think) are happy to oblige:On a side note, at the post-MILF tonight, Foot dressed his son in Packers pajamas to help invoke a decision (as we all threw three Hail Mary [...]
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    Posted: July 25, 2009, 12:48am EDT

  • The MiLF is here...

    ... and teams are gathering at noon to some unlucky golf course in the 'burbs.Follow our tweeties throughout the day and evening:Twitter/#millardTwitter/#postmilfTeams:KOOLAID IN GOLF PANTS (Defending champs, final group):Paul "C'mon Get" HappeBillFootCOMMENT TROLLS:Mike G.SchuttaTroy JohnsonTHE ETHNIC TEAM:BanaiaiaiaiaiianLeoeoeoeoeoeoeoeoeoeoeeoSteve GiglANDEE'Z TEEM:ChiefJohn (Not Jon)' [...]
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    Posted: July 24, 2009, 11:20am EDT

  • To Ken Weiner

    ...Or Ken Avidor (just to make sure you get your vanity google alert).Dear Mentally Ill Drama Queen:Notwithstanding your long-held obsession with Mitch Berg;And notwithstanding your history of shopping around whatever "dirt" you may have on him to fellow left-wing douchebloggers;And notwithstanding your publishing "dirt" you think you have on Berg [...]
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    Posted: July 18, 2009, 7:15am EDT

  • FAIL & WIN

    I'll bet Learned Foot entered this TV weather contest:' [...]
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    Posted: July 03, 2009, 11:54am EDT

  • A Sure Sign That the MiLF is Coming

    As Inigo Montoya would say, "I do not think that word means what you think it means." [...]
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    Posted: May 26, 2009, 6:05pm EDT

  • Mawwaige...

    It's what bwings one of our favowite couples togevah... May 23. In honor of the nuptuals, KAR presents a favorite wedding scene:Check out Night Writer for the Blog Wedding of the Century. You may wonder why they didn't ask us to live blog, but we all know it's because they' [...]
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    Posted: May 22, 2009, 9:20am EDT

  • Spam of the Day

    This just arrived in my inbox (remember, I'm a chick):From: Adebowale AlvertonDate: Mon, 18 May 2009To: Iron MatronSubject: Make it reach your kneeWe are sure that lengthening will help you boost your intimate life!Lite your bedroom with fire once and for all!My boobs might reach my knee without my bra,' [...]
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    Posted: May 18, 2009, 4:08pm EDT

  • A Must-Have For The Post-MiLF This Year

    [...]
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    Posted: May 14, 2009, 5:49pm EDT

  • Somebody Stole My Bacon!!1! Oh, Wait.

    [...]
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    Posted: May 10, 2009, 11:08am EDT

  • Fishing Season FAIL

    [...]
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    Posted: April 27, 2009, 10:33am EDT

  • A Snappy Foreign Earworm Sing-Along

    Properly translated to Engrish, of course:Sauce got done for turd, young May!Twitted from my Tweeter. [...]
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    Posted: April 17, 2009, 9:08am EDT

  • KAR-jacking!

    I'm hijacking KAR for a moment to state, for the record, my Lego cartoons make Fleen look like amateurish twaddle.UPDATE: Yes, I changed this title from "KAR Hijacking" to "KAR-jacking." And, yes, I'm very mad at myself for not going with "KAR-jacking" to begin with. I'm slipping in my advancing' [...]
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    Posted: April 06, 2009, 2:03pm EDT

  • As the Yule Log is to Christmas, The Bacon Log is to MiLF

    This is a must-have menu item for the 2009 post-MiLF feast. The video lasts 13 minutes, so could also function like the yule log video played on Christmas Day. Enjoy. A drool napkin is recommended. [...]
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    Posted: March 23, 2009, 4:51pm EDT

  • Politics At Its Finest

    While we mourn fewer Foot posts here (and even fewer from me for awhile), let this be of cheer and a reminder of KAR's raison d'être:Don't forget you can also follow Foot and me at Twitter while we're in recess. [...]
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    Posted: March 10, 2009, 11:55am EDT

  • Iron Maiden, Supertramp, David Bowie, Yes and Iron Maiden Can Teach Us a Lot About the Future of Blogging

    Times change very quickly and you have to grow up early. Ch-ch-ch-changes changing places, so I must be moving on. My heart is heavy as I turn my back and leave.-- Iron Maiden, David Bowie, Yes, Supertramp and Iron MaidenAs you may have noticed, my output has been a bit [...]
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    Posted: March 09, 2009, 12:49pm EDT

  • Negotiations Are Underway

    There possibly may be a Major Announcement on Monday. [...]
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    Posted: March 06, 2009, 1:25pm EST

  • Friday Fail

    I guess I'll have to give up Christianity for Lent this year...And, since it's now okay to wear hijabs for MN Drivers License photos, I shall wear this for my renewal photo next year:' [...]
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    Posted: March 06, 2009, 12:31pm EST

  • MilF(man) Returns

    All past, present and future MiLFers, PostMilFers, groupies, wannabes and hangers on: Didn't get the memo? Shoot me an email at koolaidreport (at) yahoo (dot) com, and I'll hook ya' up.' [...]
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    Posted: March 03, 2009, 1:57pm EST

  • I'm Feeling Good About My IRA. You?

    As if Monday's don't suck enough, there's this bit of cheer:In midafternoon trading, the Dow fell 214.89, or 3 percent, to 6,848.04. The Dow last closed below the 7,000 level on May 1, 1997. Broader stock indicators also slid. The Standard & Poor's 500 index fell 25.15, or 3.4 percent,' [...]
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    Posted: March 02, 2009, 4:05pm EST

  • We Report. You Rewipe

    Long for the days when your ass touched soft cotton diaper material? Well, throw those rolls of TP away — I mean, RECYCLE those rolls and make the switch to Soft Cloth Toilet Wipes!Using cloth toilet wipes actually has many advantages. For one, it's a lot more comfortable and soft [...]
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    Posted: February 27, 2009, 12:12pm EST

  • It Begins

    [...]
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    Posted: February 26, 2009, 1:25pm EST

  • Bobo The Foul-Mouthed Chimp Looking For New Home

    Congress acted on new chimp ownership rules as fast as Bobo can fling poo on a zoo visitor:Rep. Kirk said, "It is inhumane to cage primates in private homes. Besides the animal cruelty concerns, the interstate movement of pet primates creates serious public health and safety risks. The Captive Primate" [...]
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    Posted: February 25, 2009, 4:18pm EST

  • I Don't Think That Word Means What You Think It Means

    This is easily the dumbest thing I've read this month:For at least a decade Republicans have been shrieking and ranting about activist judges. Judges who will ignore law and precedent. Who will interpret our laws and our Constitution instead of upholding them. We all know the truth is that they' [...]
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    Posted: February 24, 2009, 1:12pm EST

  • The Devil's in the Detailing

    Let him who hath understanding reckon the number of the beast, for it is a human number. Its number is six hundred and sixty six.The following is true.This morning, I was alone in my car. My mind was blank. Just driving to work so I could make some bank. A [...]
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    Posted: February 23, 2009, 12:52pm EST

  • A Monkey Can't Get a Word in Edgewise.

    So maybe you've heard about the outrage coming from the outrage-based community over an editorial cartoon which made use of a well-known cliche that happens to feature a monkey. We have a black president now, after all, so the Keepers of the Language are mandating that all stylebooks must be' [...]
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    Posted: February 20, 2009, 1:38pm EST

  • So, Foot...Where Have You Been?

    I needed a break. Thanks for asking.A break from what?I needed a break from the stupid. Let me back up and explain.Blogging - when it's at it's best - is primarily about engagement; engagement with ones readers either intellectually or temporally through comment threads; engagement with co-bloggers; engagement with other [...]
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    Posted: February 19, 2009, 12:59pm EST

  • Open Thread - with Frank Zappa lyrics

    Foot has been on hiatus, so I'll take this opportunity for a thread to add your deep thoughts in the comments section. The only requirement is that it contain lyrics from a Frank Zappa song.A sample of the late, great Zappa's prose:Y'know, my python boot is too tightI couldn't get' [...]
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    Posted: February 18, 2009, 9:02am EST

  • American I-dull

    Two gals from Minnesota have advanced to the next round of American Idol. Jesse Langseth, sister of Jonny Lang and talented, passed (the show will air in the next two weeks). Casey Carlson sucked the big FAIL last night trying to sing a vintage Police tune. My eye is still [...]
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    Posted: February 18, 2009, 8:52am EST

  • Moron Progressives Seek 1900% Increase in Beer Taxes

    Ever heard of progressive taxes? This proposal out of Oregon gives it a whole new meaning: PORTLAND, Ore. -- Five Oregon state lawmakers want to impose a hefty tax on beer and have introduced a bill that brewers say would cripple them. Four Portland legislators joined a Springfield senator to [...]
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    Posted: February 16, 2009, 12:23pm EST

  • KAR-Approved Books For Kidz

    As we take a brief break this weekend from ThunderJounaling (Check the right sidebar for Foot's ThunderTwittery), enjoy some books recently added in the children's section of the KAR library:And this group of titles we're in the process of acquiring:1. You Are Different and That's Bad 2. The Boy Who' [...]
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    Posted: February 14, 2009, 8:19am EST

  • I Can Haz Monsters?

    Who'd have thought we have a local producer who's putting out a show on unknown life forms?Whether they're tracking Big Foot, looking for the Loch Ness monster or searching for giant squid, the "MonsterQuest" team is always on the hunt. The brainchild of Blaine producer Doug Hajicek, the show (8' [...]
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    Posted: February 11, 2009, 1:11pm EST

  • No, This Is Not a Repeat from 2008. Or 2007. Or 2006. Or...

    I interrupt my ThunderJournaling retirement to present the following tired story:Brett Favre informed the New York Jets on Wednesday he will retire after 18 seasons, ending a record-setting career in which he was one of the NFL’s premier quarterbacks.The 39-year-old instructed agent James “Bus” Cook to tell the team of [...]
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    Posted: February 11, 2009, 1:00pm EST

  • Flashing

    So that's why he goes by the moniker "Flash":Forgive me if I don't scroll down. [...]
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    Posted: February 10, 2009, 1:48pm EST

  • Ride Pelosi!!1!

    [...]
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    Posted: February 10, 2009, 11:56am EST

  • KAR: Now With BACON

    Try it. It's delicious! [...]
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    Posted: February 06, 2009, 4:10pm EST

  • OPEN THEARD FOR ASSPIREING DOOSHBAGGS! LOLOL!!111

    Difficulty: All submissions must resemble a typical YouTube comment.CLOSED CIRCUIT TO RYAN: I am expecting wonderful things from you. [...]
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    Posted: February 06, 2009, 1:49pm EST

  • An Alternate Reality....of Dorkiness!

    In The Matrix, Neo is required to take either the red pill or the blue pill.What would have happened had he taken both? Discuss. (Morpheus reaching into his gullet and retreiving them with a smooth, digitally-enhanced kung fu move is not a valid answer.) [...]
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    Posted: February 05, 2009, 4:07pm EST

  • The Most Obvious One-Liner of the Day

    Bill Gates, the billionaire founder of Microsoft and a renowned philanthropist, let loose a swarm of mosquitoes at a technology conference in California...Rolling out the new version of Vista already?HAY-OHHHH.I'll be here all week. Try the veal.[Link]' [...]
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    Posted: February 05, 2009, 2:22pm EST

  • Piercing Commentary

    During the 10 or so minutes of American Idol that I was able to watch last night in between deflecting the various objects Moonchild was hurling at my crotch, I noticed something about a lot of contestants' faces. An overwhelming number of them had shards of metal impaled on various' [...]
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    Posted: February 05, 2009, 1:21pm EST

  • I Got a Bad Feeling About This

    Some dateless wonder calculated the cost of building a Death Star:A guy called Ryszard Gold—who probably is an alien villain from the Outer Rim planets and got a 49-point score in our Geek Social Aptitude Test—made the calculation of the most basic Death Star's price with current materials and space' [...]
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    Posted: February 04, 2009, 3:22pm EST

  • Embrace the Suck

    Yes, my ThunderJournaling has sucked this week. But at least I have a good excuse:I just don't care.' [...]
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    Posted: February 04, 2009, 1:44pm EST

  • KAR'S 1 BILLIONTH POST!!1!11!!!!

    If a powerful Republican did this, leftyboners wouldn't shut up about it for 6 years:500 million???? That's, like, twice the population of San Francisco! [...]
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    Posted: February 04, 2009, 1:37pm EST

  • Side Effects Include FAIL

    [...]
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    Posted: February 03, 2009, 11:39pm EST

  • Top 11 Beer Brand Names that Sound Like Euphamisms for Taking a Shit

    Hint: insert the words "taking a(n)" before each beer.11. Asahi Super Dry10. Rogue Brutal Bitter9. Newcastle Brown8. Grain Belt Premium7. Dos Equis6. Guinness Stout5. Surly Bender4. Bell's Best Brown3. Anchor Steam2. Surly Furious1. Schlitz' [...]
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    Posted: February 03, 2009, 2:02pm EST

  • Cognitive Dysentery

    Far far far left-wing nutjob the Wege who, for the last 8 years, never saw a Republican he wouldn't slander:It’s tiresome when the loyal opposition is not loyal, or even opposite (just contrary).Join the fucking club.Obama's only been in office 2 weeks; try to pace yourself. [...]
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    Posted: February 03, 2009, 1:46pm EST

  • Open Thread for Sisyphus

    "I could come up with a better open thread with half my brain tied behind my back." --Sisyphus, February 3, 2009. 8:52 amSisyphus only, please. [...]
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    Posted: February 03, 2009, 11:21am EST

  • Bacon Pron

    Drool. [...]
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    Posted: February 02, 2009, 1:44pm EST

  • Open Thread for Everybody

    Difficulty: All comments must reference a Rush lyric.You know we've told you before, but you didn't hear us then: new world, digital and working men, and analog kids only, please. [...]
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    Posted: February 02, 2009, 1:00pm EST

  • Super Bowl Predictions

    UPDATED!!1!!1!Not about the game (Steelers will kill). I'd like your predictions on what dumbass statements will come out of our Senator A-Klo as she watches the game with P-Bo:Sen. Amy Klobuchar is one of the chosen few members of Congress who will join President Obama Sunday night at the White' [...]
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    Posted: January 30, 2009, 3:19pm EST

  • Moron Mail

    Colemanpalooza continues:Hmm. Maybe if Sen. Norm Coleman hadn't stood so close to President Bush for eight years, 226 more people would have voted for him.Hmmm. That would have been some devotion given that Coleman was only in Congress for the past six years.DOUG BONERSPAZ, PLYMOUTHPeople, please - and I cannot' [...]
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    Posted: January 29, 2009, 12:37pm EST

  • Where Are My Shoes?

    You know that old adage "a lie can circle the earth 3 times before the truth can even tie its shoes"?We're getting a rare opportunity to see that old saw played out in real time.' [...]
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    Posted: January 29, 2009, 8:59am EST

  • Truth is an Also Ran

    The increasingly dim Joe Bodell on Fakefakewebsitecrashgate:Deep thought: if Truth were pitted in a horse race against Fiction, which would win?Deeper thought: truth doesn't race. Indeed, it doesn't even move, no matter how hard some try to whip it.If the search results on Twitter this evening are any indication, Truth [...]
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    Posted: January 29, 2009, 8:31am EST

  • Franken Shill Fakes "Fake" Crashed Website Story.

    Aaron Landry at Pooplius thinks he's got, er...something:Today, Team Coleman’s blogger at MDE, Ryan Flynn, posted a tidbit today:[Blockquote]“THOUSANDS OF HITS CRASH COLEMAN WEBSITE”ST PAUL – Information recently added to the Coleman for Senate website, whereby people can find out which Minnesota voters the Franken campaign is trying to disenfranchise,' [...]
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    Posted: January 28, 2009, 3:12pm EST

  • $hameless

    So as hundreds (thousands?) of Target, Best Buy and Ecolab employees set to creating their new Monster.com accounts, Education Minne$ota has taken to the airwaves to beg that you please - PLEASE! - think of the teachers' union's well-being children. Perhaps you've seen these ads during the local news programs, [...]
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    Posted: January 28, 2009, 1:32pm EST

  • If Team Obama Were a Pit Crew...

    ... this symbolizes January 20: [...]
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    Posted: January 28, 2009, 11:43am EST

  • Open Thread for Peev / Penigma

    ...Since he seems to now need a new place to act like a semi-literate git. Let's see how many blogs he can get banned from in one day. Peev / Penigma (and impersonators) only, please. [...]
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    Posted: January 27, 2009, 4:42pm EST

  • MSPaint Sucks

    Original can be found here in case you want to, y'know... whatever. ' [...]
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    Posted: January 27, 2009, 11:54am EST

  • My Petition Mission

    Y'all remember Care2, the online petition site? No? OK, I'll explain. Care2 is an online petition site where users can draft their own self-righteous demands for whatever, and others of like mind can sign them. About a year ago, our colleague in ThunderJournalism, Ryan discovered that the site does not verify [...]
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    Posted: January 26, 2009, 1:07pm EST

  • Creeping Debt

    Enough mirth! The internet is serious business, and this are serious times. I hear a lot of wailing and gnashing of teeth about Minnesota's budget shortfall. And as usual the solutions to deal with this deficit offered boil down to either raising revenue (ie taxes), cutting spending or a combination of [...]
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    Posted: January 23, 2009, 1:20pm EST

  • KAR Guesses Whereabouts of Winter Carnival Medallion

    The PiPress posts the latest and current clues here. Much of the history remains a mystery Water and ice are here With bower enclosed and beasts exposed Total Giveaway!!1! Foot's House. [...]
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    Posted: January 23, 2009, 1:11pm EST

  • Get Yer Codpiece On

    I submit that for next year's Mirth Day we all wear a red "codpiece" outside of our clothes like Larry. Do ya dance. Word.' [...]
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    Posted: January 22, 2009, 5:52pm EST

  • Top 11 Lines in "Word Up"

    11. No matter where you say it you’ll know that you'll be heard 10. Ya' got to realize that you're acting like fools 9. If there's music we can use it 8. When you hear the call, you've got to get it underway 7. Tell your brother, your sister and your mama too 6. No' [...]
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    Posted: January 22, 2009, 1:52pm EST

  • Mirth Day Parody Song

    "You Suck" Sung to the tune of "Word Up" (Cheesy midi here.) Yo, "feminist" bloggers around the world Stop embarrassing yourselves in front of all the boys and girls Tell the Fecker, Carpenter and that Marcotte too Cause they say they'll throw down but they're just steppin' in poo Stab your finger in the air like your' [...]
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    Posted: January 22, 2009, 1:02pm EST

  • What's the Word? Open Thread for Mirth Day

    All People of Mirth without blogs welcome to post here. Blogs participating in Mirth Day will be noted below and updated as necessary. Now do your dance, do your dance, do your dance quick mama. BLOGGING FOR MIRTH Mr. D Sandwich of FAIL & AIDS Bogus Doug Banaiaiaiaiaiaiaiiaiaiaiaian!!!1!!1!aiaia!!!!!!!1111!1 [...]
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    Posted: January 22, 2009, 9:51am EST

  • KAR FAQ - Mirth Day Edition

    I'm participating in Blogs for Mirth Day. Is there anyone I need to notify? Tell your brother, your sister and your mama too. 'Cause I got this weird thing to show you - Then you'll know just what to do. When I'm in the classroom, and the teacher asks a question to which I [...]
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    Posted: January 22, 2009, 9:29am EST

  • Blogs for Mirth Day - Gotta Get it Underway

    Happy Mirth Day!1!1!11 Let us kick off this special day, with the official BFMD Anthem: For this year's Mirth Day, KAR will be paying tribute to the greatest pop song of all time throughout the day (no, not the one in the video). Stay tuned.' [...]
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    Posted: January 22, 2009, 8:47am EST

  • Why We Blog for Mirth

    Some people get excited about the stupidest things: Oh January! I love, love, love this month of the year. For starters, my birthday is in January. The State of the Union is also in January, and for a geek like me, that's political candy. And then, of course, there's NARAL [...]
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    Posted: January 21, 2009, 1:06pm EST

  • The Choice is Yours

    You can either Blog for Mirth... ...or you can be a total pantload. Tomorrow. [...]
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    Posted: January 21, 2009, 9:45am EST

  • Top 11 New Dances Performed at Tonight's Inaugural Ball

    11. The Baracktusi 10. The Compact Fluorescent Slide 9. The Biden Stomp & Lurch 8. Barackata 7. Kenya line 6. The Skank (This is the Secretary of State's Dance). 5. The Husein Hustle 4. The Obambo. 3. The Cha Change 2. The Cha Ching 1. The Barackarena EPILOGUE: If you thought the only reason for this post's existence was to get [...]
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    Posted: January 20, 2009, 1:29pm EST

  • Whoa

    At 11:01 today, 52% of the people in my office just... disappeared. Not sure where they went or why some of us were Left Behind. [...]
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    Posted: January 20, 2009, 12:12pm EST

  • Come On In, the Kool-Aid's Warm!!1!

    Found at Rush Limbaugh's site: Parents in Wake County, North Carolina, at an elementary school there, kids "will be required to eat in classrooms on Tuesday so they can spend two hours watching the [immaculation] on TV." Another school is going to force the kids to eat lunch at 10:30 so [...]
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    Posted: January 20, 2009, 11:47am EST

  • Fail Weekend Edition

    1. Corn: meant for food, not fuel. 2. A slo-mo fail we all saw coming. 3. A fail before he even begins. To cheer failed Strib owners and Non-monkey (supposedly laid off, refusing to leave), and give false hope to Mark Dayton, we offer: [...]
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    Posted: January 17, 2009, 8:57pm EST

  • Death Of The Strib

    I have information on the killer of the Minneapolis based news circular known as the Star Tribune. I do not know who I can trust in this matter. Including the city mayor, Mr. R.T. Rybak and his police force. Strib had friends in high and low places. I will be monitoring these [...]
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    Posted: January 16, 2009, 5:57pm EST

  • Open Thread for Everybody

    Difficulty: all comments must reference a Yes lyric. All good people, only please. [...]
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    Posted: January 16, 2009, 1:39pm EST

  • Totally Saw This Coming

    The flight was jinxed. [...]
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    Posted: January 15, 2009, 4:23pm EST

  • Let's See This on the Cover of Time Magazine

    Nice. But we REALLY could have used this 3 months ago. [...]
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    Posted: January 15, 2009, 3:12pm EST

  • I Just Don't Feel Like Doing This Any More - KAR 2008 in Review Part 10

    So very tired. OCTOBER 10/1 through 10/31 - Nothing interesting happened. Insert Iowa housewife bathroom sex joke here. NOVEMBER 11/1 through 11/30 - Nothing interesting happened. Al Franken still not a Senator. DECEMBER 12/1 - Drunken married woman from Iowa has sex with a stranger in a Metrodome bathroom stall during the Gophers - Hawkeyes game, [...]
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    Posted: January 15, 2009, 1:09pm EST

  • Behind the Mirth: A Behind the Scenes Look at the Collaborative Creative Process at KAR

    The following is the actual e-mail exchange between LearnedFoot (LF) and Iron Matron (IM) in which they discussed the design of the epic Blogs for Mirth Day logo. IM: Hey Foot, Here’s a large and small logo. Likey? (Picture attached featuring a rather vanilla "Mask of Comedy" motif.) LF: I'm looking for [...]
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    Posted: January 15, 2009, 8:58am EST

  • Blogs for Mirth Day Graphic

    Steal this pic and use with your Mirth Day posts: Here's a smaller version: Iron Matron is a national treasure. KAR will have a special feature on the creation of this graphic later. [...]
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    Posted: January 14, 2009, 9:41pm EST

  • Blogs for Mirth FAQ

    So what's the deal with this Bolgs for Mirth Day, anyway? What's a "bolg"? Sorry, that was a typo. Please don't be obtuse. You know damn well what I was talking about. Right-o. Blogs for Mirth Day is a day for all sane bloggers who know their areas of expertise and the limitations [...]
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    Posted: January 14, 2009, 12:31pm EST

  • Aim Low, Shoot Low

    UPDATED LearnedFoot's First Postulate of Blogging provides: Any blog with the word "dump" in its name is a waste of bandwidth run by losers and misfits who can't get laid. And if on the off-chance, they could get laid, they're probably lousy in the sack. And they're morbidly obese too. And so it [...]
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    Posted: January 13, 2009, 1:15pm EST
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