Items by Jess Gulbranson

• The "Grouper Christmas Album" Petition

  —Crappy Indie Music -- The Blog!

  Number of comments: 3
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  Yes, that photo is doctored. I don't know that Liz Harris has ever worn a Santa hat onstage in her' [...]
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  Posted: December 19, 2009, 11:41pm EST
  by Jess Gulbranson

• Sparkle Girl reviews Dick Dale, KING OF THE SURF GUITAR!!!

  —Crappy Indie Music -- The Blog!

  Number of comments: 1
  
  
  Hello, it is I, your humblest translator. There were some technical difficulties, otherwise this would have been Sparkle Girl's first solo post, so I will again function as trance medium, summoning her ebullient reviews from the otherworld that is Craigslist! Thanks, Michele, I love [...]
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  Posted: December 18, 2009, 7:23am EST
  by Jess Gulbranson

• SparkleGirl's review of Hockey/Passion Pit at the Crystal Ballroom

  —Crappy Indie Music -- The Blog!

  Number of comments: 7
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  I don't really know if that is what Sparkle Girl looks like, it was just one of the first Google image results' [...]
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  Posted: December 09, 2009, 1:54pm EST
  by Jess Gulbranson

• Hey ladies...

  —Crappy Indie Music -- The Blog!

  Number of comments: 11
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  Nah, that's not fair. Anybody can answer this. But maybe this is a peculiarity that you rocker ladies have experienced...
  
  What's so hard about meeting people [...]
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  Posted: December 06, 2009, 11:45pm EST
  by Jess Gulbranson

• I Wanna Context You Up (All Night)

  —Crappy Indie Music -- The Blog!

  Number of comments: 1
  No one will argue that context is important. No one! But how important is it exactly, and to what extent is context necessary to fully appreciate a work of art? Let's talk about it, shall we.
  
  It's a constant issue in critical circles and I doubt it will every [...]
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  Posted: November 14, 2009, 7:36pm EST
  by Jess Gulbranson

• TURN MY HEADPHONES UP!!! Volume 4

  —Crappy Indie Music -- The Blog!

  Number of comments: 2
  I'm reviewing four albums in this installment because it's Volume 4. And because I fucking feel like it! Okay?
  
  VOIVOD- "Infini"
  
  If you refer to David Bowie as a 'musical chameleon' you should be punched in the dick. Not because it isn't true, but because it's cliche. Try [...]
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  Posted: November 06, 2009, 10:33pm EST
  by Jess Gulbranson

• GULBRANSON/NDEGEOCELLO: THE INTERVIEW

  —Crappy Indie Music -- The Blog!

  Number of comments: 5
  
  Have you ever interviewed a 10-time Grammy nominee? Probably not. Well, now I have, and I'm here to tell you that it's not as easy as just walking up to them and saying "Hey, what's up, awesome person!" Since it may not be easy for' [...]
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  Posted: November 04, 2009, 10:02pm EST
  by Jess Gulbranson

• A Portentous Announcement

  —Crappy Indie Music -- The Blog!

  Number of comments: 4
  
  It is the honor of this humble(stop snickering) blogger to be interviewing the great Meshell Ndegeocello here in the next few days. I wanted to get this out there because not only is this a big first for the blog, moving into the interview area, [...]
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  Posted: October 27, 2009, 4:54pm EDT
  by Jess Gulbranson

• BAT COUNTRY!!! Volume 2

  —Crappy Indie Music -- The Blog!

  Number of comments: 2
  So after stacking the beginning of the last installment with cool new videos and degrading into sheer weirdness, I got to thinking about what exactly it was that I was trying to accomplish here. Still not having figured it out, here are some crazy-ass videos that I either found on [...]
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  Posted: October 24, 2009, 8:11pm EDT
  by Jess Gulbranson

• TURN MY HEADPHONES UP!!! Volume 3. LOCAL EDITION

  —Crappy Indie Music -- The Blog!

  Number of comments: 0
  Sometimes I forget that Crappy Indie Music not only has bloody Portland roots, but also a local focus. Hey, since I live here and love it here it might as well be time to celebrate.
  
  XUOSOUX- "Under Sun" EP
  
  You know, it's almost a [...]
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  Posted: October 24, 2009, 4:30pm EDT
  by Jess Gulbranson

• Excellent is not good enough! The Autopilot Is For Lovers album review.

  —Crappy Indie Music -- The Blog!

  Number of comments: 0
  
  From the title of Morrissey's album Vauxhall and I and the lyrics to his track "Reader Meets Author", some drew the conclusion that he was firing a musical shot across the bow of his almost supernaturally gifted biographer Johnny Rogan, with whom he'd had a' [...]
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  Posted: September 04, 2009, 6:45am EDT
  by Jess Gulbranson

• TURN MY HEADPHONES UP!!! Volume 1

  —Crappy Indie Music -- The Blog!

  Number of comments: 2
  
  
  "You can't just put velvet in the shit and think they're nice headphones!"
  
  This is the first installment of my new column of mini music reviews, intended to be briefer and breezier, with a slightly smaller chance of critical douchiness than normal.
  
  "Put some treble in" [...]
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  Posted: August 22, 2009, 8:43pm EDT
  by Jess Gulbranson

• We claim this town's music scene for baby formula

  —Crappy Indie Music -- The Blog!

  Enclosure: [download]

  Number of comments: 3
  
  
  
  So we've all heard about the child prodigy, and the crazy scheme where the parent has the kid smear some finger paint around then sells it as modern art- this is not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about how awesome my daughter' [...]
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  Posted: July 24, 2009, 3:15pm EDT
  by Jess Gulbranson

• Turn this thing around, I'm going home. Lozen show preview 8/5

  —Crappy Indie Music -- The Blog!

  
  Now, not to date myself, if it isn't already painfully obvious that I am old and uncool, but I went to high school in the first half of the nineties. This was good for me in many respects, as I had moved from a small' [...]
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  Posted: July 20, 2009, 8:13am EDT
  by Jess Gulbranson

• Open Letter to "Cage The Elephant"

  —Crappy Indie Music -- The Blog!

  Number of comments: 9
  Well, I've been pretty absent from the blog recently, and for that I'm sorry. RL and the band and novel #2 have been a real time- and inspiration-suck. I took a look at what I've been writing as well, and found that I've been doing positive reviews of really awesome [...]
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  Posted: July 04, 2009, 9:54am EDT
  by Jess Gulbranson

• EP Review- "L.A.B."- Lose the acronym, chegados.

  —Crappy Indie Music -- The Blog!

  Number of comments: 0
  
  
  
  
  No, seriously. I've never quite understood how successful and/or otherwise competent bands think that it's okay to have a name that is an acronym. I'm not talking about abbreviations- ELP and PIL are safe here. Really, though, there are enough ridiculous band' [...]
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  Posted: May 28, 2009, 7:10am EDT
  by Jess Gulbranson

• Album Review: Tortoise- "Beacons of Ancestorship"

  —Crappy Indie Music -- The Blog!

  Number of comments: 5
  
  As I get older and the engine that powers my raw cognitive skills goes into decline, I've noticed a certain mental artifact increase in frequency. I often immediately misread items to humorous effect. My Facebook friends will probably attest to this. So if you are' [...]
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  Posted: May 18, 2009, 10:00am EDT
  by Jess Gulbranson

• Blow your mind... into the future

  —Crappy Indie Music -- The Blog!

  Number of comments: 1
  Well, the future didn't turn out quite like we planned. And I don't mean that European tour that was this close back in '97, or the ill-fated "I do" from that same year. No, I'm talking about Web 2.o. It just wasn't quite the mad-scientist extravaganza that I (and a' [...]
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  Posted: April 23, 2009, 6:49am EDT
  by Jess Gulbranson

• Musical Tourniquet: Meeting your bandmate for the first time after lengthy internet collaboration

  —Crappy Indie Music -- The Blog!

  Number of comments: 2
  
  Heh, sorry Eriq. A quick riff on the title of your excellent series was unavoidable.
  As it turns out, the meeting of the minds went quite well. While of course Murphy's Law was in full effect for us (my wife got ill, baby needed watching, [...]
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  Posted: April 06, 2009, 10:29am EDT
  by Jess Gulbranson

• Album Review: Double Dagger "More"

  —Crappy Indie Music -- The Blog!

  Number of comments: 2
  
  
  As in "Balti-."
  
  I am learning to be suspicious- and rightly so- of bands' press releases. I'm not sure if there is simply a modality of writing and presenting them that persists from the old days of Payola and pin-striped hustle, some sort [...]
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  Posted: March 30, 2009, 9:10am EDT
  by Jess Gulbranson

• Album Review: Charlotte & Magon "Love Happening"

  —Crappy Indie Music -- The Blog!

  Number of comments: 1
  Well, I hope that the boy/girl duo... how to say, convention? Trope? Fad? Archetype? Whatever, I hope that it doesn't burn itself out. I've commented in other places about its ubiquity these days, but one aspect of it that seems to be just as is the romantic connection between the [...]
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  Posted: March 28, 2009, 2:32pm EDT
  by Jess Gulbranson

• Wet t-shirt- excuse me, TRIBUTE NITE

  —Crappy Indie Music -- The Blog!

  Number of comments: 2
  
  
  
  So, looking in the A&E I notice that there are not one but TWO tribute nights coming up, one for Tom Petty and one for Tom Waits. Why so many Toms? And more importantly, where is the Tom Jones tribute show? This [...]
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  Posted: March 06, 2009, 2:33pm EST
  by Jess Gulbranson

• All You Have To Do Is Ask

  —Crappy Indie Music -- The Blog!

  Number of comments: 0
  
  
  After our recent bout of Stabbitystabbitystabstabstab nostalgia, I had to get hold of that demo, at all cost. Of course, it was way to easy. Now, it's pertinent to CIMTB because Dan is local now, and has been since the '90s. Before that he [...]
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  Posted: March 02, 2009, 9:52am EST
  by Jess Gulbranson

• Extra Golden- "Thank You Very Quickly": You're Goddam Welcome

  —Crappy Indie Music -- The Blog!

  Number of comments: 0
  
  
  
  I have to just put it out there: I'm sorry, Phil. I don't like Vampire Weekend.
  
  
  
  I didn't like them when they were the Clash, either. I know you said that since I liked Peter Gabriel, I would like' [...]
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  Posted: February 26, 2009, 6:59am EST
  by Jess Gulbranson

• Highway to RAWK

  —Crappy Indie Music -- The Blog!

  Number of comments: 2
  
  
  Valentine's Day, Kayla and I went for a romantic evening at the Hawthorne Theater, for the Autism Awareness concert. To prevent this sensitive issue from blowing up all over the face of CIMTB, I've decided to move my more critical and reflective observations to' [...]
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  Posted: February 18, 2009, 9:22am EST
  by Jess Gulbranson

• Building a bridge! Well, shit, an imaginary landbridge. Nevermind, Jess Gulbranson's live music pick for February 19th.

  —Crappy Indie Music -- The Blog!

  Number of comments: 1
  
  I know Goldie said wait on the Oly connection thing, but since when have I ever listened to Goldie? Besides, it's a Portland show. Jenny Jenkins is embarking on a whirlwind national tour starting in PDX, then off to Redding (my goodness!) and many [...]
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  Posted: February 12, 2009, 9:21am EST
  by Jess Gulbranson

• "Heart to Elk" the next "Goya"? PJWA the next Grenadine?

  —Crappy Indie Music -- The Blog!

  Number of comments: 2
  You have to know people.
  
  I didn't realize it, but Point Juncture WA's new album wasn't out yet when it was pressed into my hands Sunday by their erstwhile web designer, R. Niswonger. He didn't realize that I was writing for this fine' [...]
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  Posted: February 09, 2009, 8:17am EST
  by Jess Gulbranson

• Goldie, I got you beat...

  —Crappy Indie Music -- The Blog!

  Number of comments: 4
  
  
  
  Just found out last night that I'll be going to Numinous Knot practice for the first time in 2 years. Apparently the reunion show is going to be on for this year, though we seem to be spacing them out according' [...]
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  Posted: February 09, 2009, 7:52am EST
  by Jess Gulbranson

• What makes it 'indie'? Hell, what makes it 'good'?

  —Crappy Indie Music -- The Blog!

  Number of comments: 6
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  Saturday I attended the CD release party for Robert Bassett's "Shades of Love." Now, I must spit out right now that for a first post I feel this may go beyond [...]
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  Posted: February 03, 2009, 5:39am EST
  by Jess Gulbranson