
I’ve been super busy and am still super busy, but if I didn’t say something about this, I was going to explode with rage, but I’m having holiday events at my apartment and I don’t have enough time between now and then to fix holes in the [...]

I’ve been super busy and am still super busy, but if I didn’t say something about this, I was going to explode with rage, but I’m having holiday events at my apartment and I don’t have enough time between now and then to fix holes in the [...]
All of a sudden everyone is dumping Obama faster than the pregnant cheerleader on Glee.
Apparently, there are some things that test even the conscience of Bill Ayers. Not that I’m all about Bill Ayers. But seriously, if you’ve got the man who basically birthed your career protesting your [...]

I’m not sure if this is meant to be serious, or a sort-of ironic protest against Obama’s failure to end the drug war. Given that its ecstasy and considering that I was under the impression that no one has actually done ecstasy since like, 1998, I would [...]

Now, okay. I don’t talk a lot about global climate change because frankly, I sucked at science, and had biology with the football coach so you know what? I don’t understand a lot of stuff about science. I get physics. I can do some math. Not a [...]

UPDATE: Charlie Brown will air next week. But its still annoying.
Listen, Obama. I understand that we disagree on some very pertinent issues and that we differ in terms of our ideology. I get that. Its not a big deal. Lots of people disagree, and I’m willing to [...]

…that the turkey has extensive ties to SEIU.
And when I’m talking about “turkey,” I mean the bird.
Budum-bump *creeeessh*
Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!
[...]
Okay, so I’ll admit I was a little sad about the whole Oprah-not-renewing-her-show-forever thing, partly because I feel for my city and apparently Oprah brings in a lot of tourist dollars because she has the “Midwestern White Lady” market basically covered and when they come here, they [...]
Realistically, I wouldn’t call this so much as a conservative resurgence in humor (after all, from the wealth of evidence of “conservative humor” out there, I’d venture to say no one would accuse us of, say, graduating the Second City basics program) as what happens when you throw down the [...]
Just super busy with work and writing and other stuff. Oh, and I went to Vegas. Because I don’t tell you people about my vacations anymore, because they are too super awesome now. I met Crystal Harris from the Girls Next Door. I got pictures. She was sweet and adorable [...]
It’s true.
Happy Veterans Day to all who have served and sacrificed in the line of duty for our country. Without your honor and your bravery, America (and most of the world) would not be free. Simple as that. My family would not be free, and they [...]
Our President of course, will not be joining the heads of state and celebrity freedom-fighters at the Brandenburg Gate. He’s like, busy or something.
Instead, when it comes to celebrating the 20th Anniversary of the triumph of freedom and western civilization over the backwards, oppressive Communist regime, the nation that serves [...]

This week, supporters of a government-run health care program decided to take advantage of women by holding a “Women Support the Public Option Day” wherein ladies of all stripes would pour out their feelings on the subject of health insurance, which apparently, given the height of emotion [...]
UPDATE (From E.M.): Before killing his fellow soldiers, Hasan reportedly yelled “Allahu Akbar.” The news is doing its best to reassure the country that this is not an act of terrorism, but to be honest, I don’t believe that possibility can be ruled out. That’s a heavy charge to [...]
Warning: This post is most definitely by the resident liberal and does not represent the view of the AP.
Today about 2,000 people have gathered at the Capitol to raise signs and shout once again about how the public option is killing America and taking our freedoms. Not that any [...]

So I’m still sick and working and traveling and that makes for a really nasty combination because it makes me cranky. The worst part is I feel like, at some point in my life, I invented Facebook. I’m not sure when, but I feel like, maybe when [...]
Well, apparently bad fashion and bad campaigning choices do not a winner make….let alone finish a race.
Dede Scozzafava (R) announced “that she is suspending her campaign for the 23rd Congressional District and releasing all her supporters,” the Watertown Daily Times reports.
However, she has not thrown her support to either [...]

I don’t get premium networks anymore since I discovered that Netflix will stream all of the shows at my convenience about a week after the season is over. Not that I was ever really interested before, though seeing Bullsh*t! on its first run has always been tempting, [...]

So, um, I guess this is sort of the Obama Administration’s version of standing on an aircraft carrier in a flight suit.
The U.S. Commerce Department says in a report that the recession is over, as the economy grew at a 3.5 percent pace in the [...]
Honestly, I feel like crap today. I thought it was the flu, but typically the flu involves some actual movement on the flu-like symptoms front and currently I’m stalled at “achy like I’m being attacked by every molecule of air individually as though they could think for themselves and are, [...]

Time for our annual “What Occupation Will Paris Hilton Turn Slutty for Halloween?” contest. Last year this took place on Twitter and had less than stellar participation but enough to qualify as the first installment, so this year I’m bringing it to the blog in the [...]

Maybe its just me, but I really have no desire to play pick-up basketball. Not that, you know, I feel obligated to play any sport really, but I’ve been known to be a Dodgeball genius and I sort of like drinking games and I watch a lot [...]

If you have a story about how you got trashed on tequila with Hugo Chavez, its really best to keep it to yourself.
Michael Moore, the filmmaker who is a bête noire of conservatives in the United States, now appears to have made some enemies among [...]
This post is the opinion of the resident liberal.
Today’s NYT has a story about Cook County prosecutors have filed a motion to subpoena the grades, transcripts, emails, syllabi, and grading criteria of the students at Northwestern University’s journalism school who have participated in the Medill Innocence Project. The [...]
This post is the opinion solely of myself, the resident liberal, and does not represent the opinion of The American Princess, good Catholic that she is.
It’s kind of hard to come up with a good headline for a story that bothers me so badly. I am probably what one would [...]
Now, admittedly, I don’t know too much about Dede Scozzafava or NY-23 because, of course, I live in Chicago and am generally oblivious unless you’re a guest on The View. What I do know is that the Interwebs kind of hate her, Newt Gingrich appears to have endorsed her, [...]
I love the BigGovernment ACORN Videos not just because they feature a kid whose voice is exactly like Matthew Brodericks making watching the YouTube clips a little like watching Ferris Bueller’s Day Off on an ACORN Sting, but because they revel so much about the community activist organizations I see [...]

Is occasionally an awkward interaction between the Attorney General of the United States and a nightclub that recently had its offices (and the home of one of its managers) raided by the IRS, who were investigating the possibility of a kickback scheme.
Also, I seem to recall [...]

I’m about eight hours behind…um…Facebook on this particular story, but when Obama’s right about something, I feel like I have to give him his due. Break out the bongs, ladies and gentleman, because the Fed is out of the running to bust you on pot possession!
Federal [...]
There’s certainly been a wide array of opinion about Meghan McCain ever since she first came into the spotlight courtesy of her father, Sen. John, running for president. But apparently, in this age of Twitter, showing the fact that you have cleavage is apparently “slutty” and “controversial.”
Now, [...]
Somewhere, this interaction is immortalized in film. I know its been in an episode of Law & Order: SVU or some CBS hour-long drama somewhere but I can’t put my finger on it and its driving me crazy.
[...]
To quote the great 30 Rock, without celebrities how would Americans know who to vote for? For that matter, how would we know what to do with all of our free time?
EIF is mobilizing the entire entertainment community around the ground-breaking, multi-year I PARTICIPATE, which [...]

I don’t even understand this. The actual analogy doesn’t even make sense. I mean, sure, I get it, Keith Olbermann hates Michelle Malkin and, this being the case, decides to (1) dehumanize her by referring to her as a “mashed-up bag of meat with lipstick” and [...]

If Paul Krugman and Tom Coburn were slightly more attractive — as in, they were five-foot-ten bottle blonds with great legs, a wardrobe that consisted mainly of hand-embroidered washcloths and those FCC mandated censor bars, giant, fake breasts and the IQ of iceberg lettuce — they would [...]

For all those Japanese phrases the anime kids learned from DragonBallZ all those years ago.
One can only fear the variety of “Engrish” phrases that will now become so popular with the Japanese population, end up on T-shirts and the inevitable trend of carrying around a [...]

I understand the sentiment, but I don’t think this concept is as absolute as the State Department seems to think it is.
Certainly from our standpoint, this gives us a sense of momentum — when the United States has accolades tossed its way, rather than shoes.”
That’s the [...]
Bill Clinton must be PISSED.
President Barack Obama won the 2009 Nobel Peace Prize on Friday for “his extraordinary efforts to strengthen international diplomacy and cooperation between peoples,” the Norwegian Nobel Committee said, citing his outreach to the Muslim world and attempts to curb nuclear proliferation.
The stunning choice made [...]

So in my free time, when I’m not being the disembodied voice that haunts the collective liberal psyche, I actually do things in the city of Chicago like ride public transportation 20 blocks north to go to PetSmart for ear medicine for my cat (my life is [...]
This is a terrible idea, but I suspect, were I in possession of more money than I knew what to do with, I might do something weird and unexpected with it, like buy a football team.
Conservative talk radio host Rush Limbaugh said Tuesday he is teaming up with [...]

Well, kinda. The Los Angeles Times has a great article about how some newly released handbags are now displaying the logos of General Motors vehicles. Just thinking about it…I now want a Saturn handbag.
Cross posted at Crystal Clear Conservative
[...]We should have sent Blagojevich. At least that man knows how to negotiate.
NOTE: I feel compelled, because it has apparently gone national, to say something about the video where I announce that Chicago did not get the Olympic bid, and the room I am in erupts — very unexpectedly [...]

Common sense would tell you giving Chicago the Olympics is stupid. Least of the Olympic Bid Team’s problems being, of course, that Chicago isn’t all that crazy about the whole Olympic thing, a sentiment that seems to be growing more pervasive by the day.
Support in Chicago [...]

Just a drugged, unconscious 13-year old girl who was repeatedly violated against her will by a 43 year old man.
This morning on The View, the ladies took it upon themselves to untangle the Roman Polanski affair, because that’s their job. In the process, we learned about [...]

Not that I’m allowed to say anything that could somehow harm “our” (by “our,” I clearly mean “Chicago’s Mayor Daley”) chances of getting the Olympics, but really. I mean, really. Here we are, five days from the decision and the guy on WGN can’t seem to [...]
So there’s this awesome British show I always talk about and love dearly called Top Gear, and on this show they have a segment where they squash a celebrity into a Mazda and force them to drive around a track, and then, based on the time they register, rank them [...]

Barack Obama got to headline the parade of dictators this morning at the annual meeting of the United Nations General Assembly, and while I could make hay out of his position as an opening act for insanity, I’ll refrain. His position at the top of the bill [...]

And of every retarded musician in the world CNN could have dug out of their Muszak-fueled hovel to comment on Jimmy Carter, they had to pick Dave Matthews? Is his famed place in history as John Edwards’ mistress’s dream wedding enough to resurrect his four-year-dead political [...]

This is actually pretty serious. The dude they busted in NYC for having ties to terrorists and an apartment full of C4 and remote detonators has admitted to the FBI that he’s a Jihadist, and prior to having been picked up, attended Al Qaeda summer [...]

What do you do when your husband is just so hot that women practically throw themselves at his feet, slip their numbers into his pockets and whisper sweet, lewd nothings in his ear? Apparently, if you’re Michelle Obama, you give your husband the silent treatment because, [...]

Its just that, in the end, he’s the kind of guy that’s so inept at personal contact you almost feel sorry for him. Almost. As in the, wow, I’ve heard of politicians being hard up for sex, but I have never heard of them having to work [...]

In case you haven’t seen it (and yesterday it would have been better to say that because I would guess a great majority of conservatives don’t watch The Daily Show, despite the plethora of reasons you should), Jon Stewart took the ACORN story wherein the Baltimore, DC, [...]

They had to use Emily.
Jostens has a new set of options for the era of Hope and Change, as seen on page 22 of their catalog.
Yes, along with one option each for Republican, Democrat, and Independent, students have two choices for Barack Obama, 44th President, for [...]
Poll on the new format with the fancy-schmancy thumbnail…you like? Not that I’m changing it, but I think it looks a bit spiffier. I’m working on a full on upgrade, but this will do for now.
[...]
Since, unlike previous speeches, next week puts him up against season premiere episodes that will, no doubt, garner far more attention than anything he can throw together, Barack Obama is eschewing the Address to the Nation in favor of giving the Top Ten List.
While Jay Leno [...]

So I sort of feel weird commenting on the death of Patrick Swayze because its revealing this uncomfortable generation gap between me and the Gen Xers. That little five or ten year difference means you either loved, loved, OMG loved Patrick Swayze or you, like [...]

Many times, I think you’re out there asking me, “Sure, you have all this, chickie, but what to you is the American Dream? What does it mean? Is it still alive?” (And yeah, I’m aware that you’re asking me questions in several posts today but someone [...]

But if you just discovered that, then you’re either over 30 or living under a rock. Dude’s an attention whore, and since he can’t get attention the good way (by, say, dropping an album that isn’t sh*t for once in a decade…Okay, so “Heartless” was good, [...]
Because two million people can’t be ignored, and there are two million people (according to ABC news, don’t get all hot and bothered and blame me if that estimate turns out to be super wrong or whatever) marching in DC today.
The bad news is, they are probably all Glenn [...]
No, really. Do we want to get our asses kicked?
The Obama administration, carrying out its campaign pledge to engage difficult regimes, agreed Friday to hold direct talks with Iran and North Korea, even though both countries have so far refused to address Washington’s main concerns related to nuclear weapons [...]

Let every nation know, whether it wishes us well or ill, that we shall pay any price, bear any burden, meet any hardship, support any friend, oppose any foe to assure the survival and the success of liberty.
My prayers are with [...]
ACORN has always claimed to be one of those benevolent organizations that helps the “little guy” pull himself up by his bootstraps and a selection of government subsidies. Heck, it even has micro-colleges where people can go to learn the important stuff about making it on their own, like who [...]
And yeah, in “that way.” When she writes like this anyway. From her latest at Salon:
But affluent middle-class Democrats now seem to be complacently servile toward authority and automatically believe everything party leaders tell them. Why? Is it because the new professional class is a glossy product of generically [...]
It pisses me off to no end that Glenn Beck got a win out of this whole Van Jones spectacle. He makes me angrier than inappropriately worn leggings and the last thing I need is for him to be right about something. Bah. The intellectual component of the conservative movement [...]
Yeah, yeah, so you knew that I couldn’t resist the Oprahpalooza. You knew I’d end up there. Yeah, I’m a liar and a traitor and whatever. After three days of having my life interrupted by ambulance reroutes, lost tourists and inexplicable humidity I deserved a free concert. And goshdarnit, I [...]
WGN Radio in Chicago is right across the street from Oprah’s anniversary party stage on Michigan Avenue, where, tomorrow, Oprah will usher in an Olympic era for Chicago by coronating herself on the Michigan Ave. bridge with the help of Fergie. They have a live feed of the setup, [...]
Because its Friday and everyone needs a little more totally nonsensical yet incredibly adorable Japanese ad campaigns about trivia-dispensing beans in their life.
Happy Friday!
[...]I moved away from the Annenberg Peace School about three months ago to my own detriment because it was across the street from this really, really fabulous Thai restaurant with the swishiest waiters ever. If you’ve never had Thai food served to you by a drag queen, let me tell [...]
UPDATE: Old and busted: Joe the Plumber. New hotness: Bill the Guy Whose Finger Got Eaten By MoveOn.
As a MoveOn.org minion.
A 65-year-old man had his finger bitten off Wednesday evening at a health care rally in Thousand Oaks, according to the Ventura County Sheriff’s Department…
A witness from the scene [...]
I understand what you’re doing by renaming Chubby Hubby to Hubby Hubby in honor of marriage equality in Vermont, or the fight for marriage equality in Vermont, or whatever. I really do. I think its cute in a weird sort of way, same as I always do when people [...]
I don’t typically see Oprah as openly hostile to me. Leading America down the primrose path to obesity and spiritual unfulfillment (and, if you’re into acai berries, long appointments with the porcelain god), yes, I believe she is. Responsible for the unfortunately long careers of twee vocal artists and terrible, [...]
Someone with a twisted sense of humor has decided that, to combat the growing trend of sexualizing pre-pubescent girls, she’d design a shirt for five-year-olds that features nipple tassels.
Would you buy a shirt for your baby that had nipple tassels on it? One company is hoping you will.
ParentDish interviewed [...]
I should be allowed to throw rocks at Al Gore.
Not that I would ever go to the beach or, you know, do outdoorsy stuff, but seriously. It was 47 degrees last night. Had I left my windows open, I would have had a cat-sicle this morning. Yesterday, I [...]
I often express a belief that the world is going to hell in a handbasket based solely on our own American commitment to anti-intellectualism. I felt that this week, this was clearly evidenced by the fact that people watched Glenn Beck interview Rush Limbaugh which, while entertaining, is definitely a [...]
UPDATE: Whoa.
Robert Goulet has taken his curtain call and Camelot has finally come to a close: Senator Ted Kennedy died today at age 77 of a brain tumor.
U.S. Senator Edward Kennedy, a towering figure in the Democratic Party who took the helm of one of America’s most fabled political [...]
What I am saying is that Meghan McCain co-hosting The View merely represents the idea that the Universe, whenever possible, will restore things to balance and order, and will place all things which have become dislodged from their appropriate location and stature, back to where they best belong: in [...]
Bob Novak, the self-proclaimed “Prince of Darkness,” died today after his battle with brain cancer. He was 78.
Novak was one of the few reporting legends left in this country, although he was in forced retirement due to his illness. Starting the Evans-Novak Report in 1963 with Rowland Evans, he [...]
There are rules about wearing shorts. Generally, as a fashion rule, I would recommend just not wearing shorts. As legwear goes, shorts are not the worst thing one can don in hot weather (leggings, of course, come to mind), but worn incorrectly and you have yourself a giant ass, huge [...]
Tom DeLay competing for the votes of everyday Americans whilst dressed in spandex, airbrushed with an orange tan, and dancing the mambo on national television with a slutty-looking foreigner in a sequin bikini? Against Donny Osmond and Aaron Carter?
YES.
Interesting-only-because-he-got-Bristol Palin-pregnant Alaskan highschooler turned famewhore Levi Johnson naked?
NO.
Networks, [...]
In the grand scheme of places I’ve lived — Detroit and Chicago — I have to say that Chicago is far superior, not just because its populated, you don’t get shot simply for being on the street past 6:30, people live here, the food and public transportation are good, and, [...]
Apparently, I’ve been working for the wrong side all along. Turns out, if you astroturf for the left they pay you. A lot. And chicks get a leg up. And I wouldn’t even have to leave my block.
And all this time I was thinking they all just [...]
I’ve been using that phrase a lot lately. Hell, if Obama can use it to end discussion on health care, then I sure as hell can use it to end discussion on, say, what I want for dinner or whether brown shoes go with black socks, or whether Mac & [...]
Dear whoever is making these Obama-as-the-Joker signs that have suddenly cropped up all over Los Angeles: I understand what you’re doing and let me say, if this is the direction we’re headed as an ideology, I am somewhat proud, at least in the sense that we’ve embraced some sort [...]
I was in Vegas. I broke even only if you consider what I spent gambling. If you consider what I spent on food, including but not limited two three different buffets, several lovely cocktail establishments, the Shops at the Venetian and the Playboy Club, I’ll probably be eating in quite [...]
It appears as though the Shoes That Make Everyone Look Like An Overgrown Toddler, Crocs may be on their last…ahem…legs. Unless we are suddenly overcome with a wave of nostalgia for plastic rubber shoes in a variety of unnatural colors, shapes and which always fit wide no matter what [...]
There’s good news and bad news in today’s economy. The bad news is, you probably don’t have a job, and if you live in Michigan, you may very well be living in a box. The good news is that you can get awesome deals on designer retail items, particularly if [...]
Unicorns can only poop rainbows for so long, I guess. That and Hope-y Change-y looks sort of like Bush-y only kind of worse and dear gawd, please not that again.
[...]Even Rep. Michelle “ACORN is coming for your children!” Bachman supports a resolution by the representative from Hawaii noting that Hawaii is officially Barack Obama’s birthplace and congratulating it on its 50 years or so of statehood.
The resolution wasn’t really intended to jam up the House Republicans, or to [...]
Not that we hear THAT much from Hillary Clinton, considering that she’s been nearly absent from our lives for almost a year now, whether unintentionally or not, but what we’re starting to hear is bordering on what we in the business like to call “Joe Biden.” I have to believe [...]
According to Fox News, which I only watch when I’m forced to, there won’t be a vote on the health care bill in the next couple of days because the House committee currently marking the bill up has Blue Dog Democrats and freshman Dems in it who, among other things, [...]
Or and the moon, or something.
Yes, Walter Cronkite died, only weeks after I had him in the death pool, and the generation not immediately affected by Michael Jackson’s death was undoubtedly caught in the same sort of mourning wave. I didn’t really know Walter Cronkite. He went off the [...]
Notsomuch. I have a real job. It interferes with my fake job or whatever this is considered. I takes priority, sad to say. At any rate, I just stopped by to say…
Liveblog on Twitter. You know it’ll be awesome.
[...]For the most part, I’m a Catholic first and a conservative second. Or third, or depending on the actions of certain Republicans, not at all. So yes, I was pretty interested to see what Barack Obama would do when he met with Pope Benedict earlier this week. Not that I [...]
I don’t care how the Today show tries to spin it, this is the stuff of SNL parody.
Obama and Sarkozy are both world leaders are pictured staring at not one but two luscious European asses, and only one of those two can legitimately believe his country is…ahem…behind him on [...]
I suspect it would this gig would be more fun if it were less…easy. I mean, at least with George W. Bush, you had to work hard to go outside the norm as far as criticism. He was a lot of things…a cowboy even…but somehow, with his ragtag collection of [...]
I’ll be honest, this week there’s really been nothing worth writing about that would need more than 140 characters to digest.
Alec Baldwin is apparently taking advantage of the new discovery that Americans will, indeed, vote anyone into office by declaring a possible candidacy for some future office he [...]
Michelle Obama has terrible fashion sense. Stop drooling all over yourself and start coming to terms with the truth: the woman can’t coordinate colors or match patterns to save her life, you know it, I know it. Lets start acting like we’re living in the reality we are so [...]
I wish I knew what to say, but I’m mostly stuck on WTF?
Saying she is taking her fight “in a different direction,” Sarah Palin announced today that she will resign as governor of Alaska and will not seek a second term.
At a press conference outside her home in Wasilla, [...]