aberrant equation

• Fly Delta - Join the CIA

  In case I haven't mentioned it before: I travel for a living. Which means I'm on a plane at least twice a week.
  
  Normally I sleep on the plane- or put in my earplugs and read the paper. And, generally, I have a few drinks before- and during the [...]
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  Posted: October 27, 2007, 9:21pm EDT
  

• Dog and the Design Star

  I was flipping through the channels and came across Larry King interviewing someone I initially thought was the really, uh, flamboyant guy from HGTV's Design Star.
  
  On closer inspection, it turned out to be "Dog" from AETV's Dog the Bounty Hunter.
  This is "Sparkle" Josh from HGTV's Design [...]
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  Posted: August 06, 2007, 10:54am EDT
  by AberrantEquation

• Worst Slogan Ever

  MORE POWER THAN YOU NEED,
  
  ONE DAY YOU'LL NEED IT
  
  
  huh? [...]
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  Posted: August 05, 2007, 9:06pm EDT
  by AberrantEquation

• Cheap(er) Gas: Thanks Giant Eagle

  Personally, I'm in favor of higher gas prices as a tool for driving down consumption.
  
  But I'm NOT one to pass up a great deal- and today I got one on gasoline.
  
  This afternoon I finally used all of the points I earned from buying groceries at Giant [...]
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  Posted: July 27, 2007, 5:01pm EDT
  by AberrantEquation

• Fish Considered Second-Class Pets?

  Have you heard about the fish food recall?
  
  I didn't think so.
  
  It wasn't on the news. I just found out about it from this sign at the grocery store.
  
  
  
  I checked the Sergeants website and, sure enough, the recalled [...]
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  Posted: July 20, 2007, 10:39am EDT
  by AberrantEquation

• No Thinking During National Emergency

  
  
  Funny stuff!
  
  Someone posted this sign on High St. in front of the Cup O' Joe. [...]
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  Posted: July 06, 2007, 9:17pm EDT
  by AberrantEquation

• There Are Alternatives

  I saw this huge billboard along the highway the other night...
  
  
  This got me thinking about the signs that SHOULD have been there. Signs like...
  
  
  or...
  
  [...]
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  Posted: June 23, 2007, 11:13am EDT
  by AberrantEquation

• Blacks, Jews and Babies?

  I saw this ridiculous bumper sticker on a car at the grocery store that attempts to equate Slavery and Genocide with Abortion:
  
  
  Enough said. [...]
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  Posted: May 20, 2007, 3:34pm EDT
  by AberrantEquation

• Truth Booth?

  I was in Cleveland last weekend- at the Tower City Mall- when I came across this crazy thing called the "Truth Booth".
  
  Sitting between the cell phone booth and the jewelry booth, this cheesy, mall-based display of unborn baby pictures was a serious embarrassment to [...]
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  Posted: May 01, 2007, 12:18am EDT
  by AberrantEquation

• I'm Kevin Kurgis and I'm a Lawyer...

  People are confused by, and deathly afraid of, legal stuff. Lawyers know this- and often create advertisements that exploit these fears.

  This Ad for Kevin Kurgis- a personal injury lawyer in Ohio- is a great example of ads that use fear to gain new customers. It's really funny- and completely [...]

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  Posted: April 15, 2007, 2:43am EDT
  by AberrantEquation

• Pat Boone's Gonna Save My Soul

  I guess I shouldn't care- they always have stupid ads on these right-wing websites.
  
  But come on- Pat Boone? Pressuring TV advertisers not to show ads during sexy tv shows?
  
  Like network television has ANYTHING sexy? Violent- maybe. But nothing sexy, I promise you.
  [...]
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  Posted: March 26, 2007, 10:21pm EDT
  by AberrantEquation

• Postal Service Sells Child Porn- Then Arrests Customers

  Don't get me wrong- I'm not a fan of child porn or people who promote it. But reading this story leaves me with a lot of unanswered questions like :
  
  1. How can the postal service post an ad for child porn and then arrest people who respond to [...]
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  Posted: March 22, 2007, 12:06am EDT
  by AberrantEquation

• My stick is sharpened… what was that return address again?

  You can buy all kinds of crazy, politically-themed crap these days.
  
  This, for example, is something called a "Postage Palâ„¢". It contains a mildly funny joke comparing two likely Democratic candidates to a poke in the eye with a sharp stick.
  
  A Postage [...]
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  Posted: March 04, 2007, 10:51pm EST
  by AberrantEquation

• Cinci-tucky Airport (CVG) Is #1 (most expensive airport)

  I live in Columbus, OH and I travel for work almost every week.

  Two weeks ago I got a call on Thursday. I needed to be in Cincinnati on Monday morning.

  It's about a hundred miles from here to there- maybe an hour an a half if the traffic is bad- but [...]

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  Posted: March 01, 2007, 10:55pm EST
  by AberrantEquation

• George Bush: Ethanol Scientist

  George loves to dress up and play pretend- Fighter Pilot, Rancher, President...
  
  Last week he dressed up like a lab tech while visiting an Ethanol plant in North Carolina.
  
  He was there promoting his weak-ass "20 in 10" proposal to reduce gasoline usage by [...]
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  Posted: February 28, 2007, 8:29pm EST
  by AberrantEquation

• But MTV would not pimp his wheelchair...

  [...]
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  Posted: February 22, 2007, 12:59am EST
  by AberrantEquation

• Neither Rain, Nor Sleet, Nor Snow...

  After I spent a bunch of time digging through the ice and snow on my sidewalk to make a path for the mail guy...
  
  [...]
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  Posted: February 15, 2007, 9:20pm EST
  by AberrantEquation

• Cornell McCleary's Grammar Sucks Almost as much as his Predictions

  In a recent post, Cornell McCleary claims that William Todd (dirtbag republican lawyer) can beat Columbus Mayor Michael Coleman. "If Todd can get outside Central Ohio money to flow his way" he says, "a Mayoral campaign ran on character issues will potentially destroy Coleman. "
  
  1. Keep dreaming. [...]
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  Posted: February 08, 2007, 1:28am EST
  by AberrantEquation

• Shooting Stuff

  
  I was a Bevis and Butthead fan... but never really got into King of the Hill.
  
  However, I found this pretty funny...
  
  Hank Hill: But I never get to bond with Bobby
  on account of he's not good at much. Shooting stuff is [...]
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  Posted: January 19, 2007, 12:40am EST
  by AberrantEquation

• Twenty-Twenty-Twenty Four Hours- Oh No!

  Let me start by saying that I like the show 24- even if it is on FOX and even though, in a recent post on RAB, Matt confesses his love for it.
  
  I will admit, there certainly are a lot of things for creepy, [...]
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  Posted: January 14, 2007, 11:21pm EST
  by AberrantEquation

• All Signs Point To...

  I have always wondered who was responsible for changing all of those signs that show the name of the Governor- and how soon, after the new Governor takes office, the signs are changed.
  
  Well- I'd like to thank the Toledo Blade for answering one part of this question.
  
  [...]
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  Posted: January 08, 2007, 1:19am EST
  by AberrantEquation

• Creation Museum Puts Artifacts of History in True, Biblical Context

  Something big is happening in Petersburg, KY. Something monumental.
  
  They are building a museum. A very special museum. And it's about damn time.
  
  For far too long 'science' has had a monopoly on museums. But that is about to change with the Creation Museum now under construction in [...]
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  Posted: January 05, 2007, 3:33pm EST
  by AberrantEquation

• Biblical Natural History In Petersburg, KY

  Answers in Genesis, the group building a creation museum in Petersburg, KY, couldn't have chosen a better site for their $25 million temple to the simple beauty of history as defined by literal bible interpretation.
  
  For the uninitiated, here is the description from their website:
  
  The 50,000 [...]
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  Posted: January 05, 2007, 11:34am EST
  by AberrantEquation

• YOUR A SCUMBUCKET FOR TAReiNG THIS OFF!

  
  I found this above the urinal at a local bar. It says:
  
  YOUR A SCUMBUCKET FOR TAReiNG THIS OFF!
  
  Everyone knows that bathroom graffiti always contains grammar and spelling mistakes.
  
  One of the most common is the use of "your" instead of [...]
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  Posted: January 03, 2007, 11:00pm EST
  by AberrantEquation

• Warning: Shoe Contains Security Device

  
  While returning my shoes after bowling, I noticed this message printed on the inside:
  
  Warning: Shoe Contains Security Device
  
  Whatever could it be?
  
  I walked outside the bowling alley, to my car, while wearing these shoes earlier in the evening.
  
  No [...]
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  Posted: January 03, 2007, 10:51pm EST
  by AberrantEquation

• Pat Robertson: God's Comic

  
  Want to know what IS NOT going to happen this year?
  
  Just check out Pat Robertson's 2007 predictions.
  
  This year he is predicting a big terrorist attack on the US.
  
  Which actually seems pretty likely.
  
  However, I am convinced that [...]
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  Posted: January 03, 2007, 10:20am EST
  by AberrantEquation

• LIVESTRONG AND PROSPER

  
  Who isn't sick and tired of hearing about Lance fucking Armstrong?
  
  I know I am.
  
  But, for those few die-hard, yellow-bracelet-wearing fanatics out there...
  
  American Century Investments has something just for you: LIVESTRONG Portfolios.
  
  What the hell does this have to [...]
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  Posted: January 02, 2007, 7:40pm EST
  by AberrantEquation

• Tradition!

  
  Target had stacks of these Traditional Electric Menorahs at their post-holiday sale.
  
  According to dictionary.com, Traditional is defined as "pertaining to time-honored orthodox doctrines".
  
  Observant Orthodox Jews, however, do not turn on electric appliances on the Sabbath (i.e. Saturday).
  
  This [...]
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  Posted: January 02, 2007, 3:47pm EST
  by AberrantEquation