Most of my teenage summers were spent in the wilds of the Texas Hill Country, employed by the Boy Scouts of America to train young lads in the ways of the outdoors, everything from building fires and swinging axes to tying knots and constructing rope bridges. It would have been [...]
It was bound to happen at some point, and happen it did. These words stand before you as my personal representative to testify that this particular happening did indeed happen. It occurred, even. You are about to stop reading because I’m not getting to the point. Or maybe you’re not [...]
They were called blue slips because they were printed on blue paper. A name decided by committee, I’m sure. Standard 8 1/2” x 11” paper, black typing, and several blank spaces where the teacher could fill in various specifics (student name, date, description of offense, teacher’s [...]
I walked near the back of the group with my baby boy in my arms. He laughed and waved at his surroundings, unaware that those big rocks all around us were markers for the dead. I did what I always do when I see headstones: calculate how many years each [...]
My wife texted me today to ask if I thought it would be funny if she posted on Facebook that she’s pregnant with twins. My immediate irrational conclusion was that this was her strange way of telling me that she was pregnant with twins. Immediate because that is how I [...]
Once upon a time, my family was structured according to that age old model wherein the guy goes out to work at some job to bring home the bread while the woman stays at home with the kiddos. Every morning, I kissed the family goodbye and headed out into the [...]
I'd let this dude teach my kids history, as long as he's not also the bus driver.
[...]When I was a kid growing up in Houston, Hurricane Alicia blew through town, ripping off rooftops, knocking over trees, flooding the streets, and just generally wreaking all manner of havoc. Our house was spared for the most part, but we were without electricity and running water for something like [...]
He was standing up on his own, and had even tried taking a few tentative steps here and there. No doubt inspired by the bipedal antics of his big bro, the baby of the family clearly wanted to be up on his own two legs. He could get along pretty [...]
I know this song came out like three years ago, but I just saw the video today. It's packed with so many of the coolest ideas, genres, and archetypes that the universe has to offer, it seems exactly like the kind of thing you would get if you pulled together' [...]
I can’t lie to you folks: I got way way way into Christmas this year. Cynicism was cast aside, irony was folded up and put away, and all the shadows of bah-humbug were driven out by the fuse-popping glow of way too many Christmas lights. I was downright dorky about [...]
Today, my wife and I passed through yet another first in our lives as parents by attending the Thanksgiving program at our 3 year old’s school. I must confess here that prior to parenthood, I quite dreaded the idea of the school program. Any depiction of one in a movie [...]
My morning routine is not a particularly easy one, but it is at least reliable in its difficulty. I know which points in the morning usually push my eldest's buttons, when he's going to drag ass, and when I need to gently cattle-prod him along so as to keep the [...]
A while back, I bought a tee-shirt with this design on it so that I could advertise to the world about one of my favorite word choice mistakes. And by favorite, I mean that which makes me cringe the most. You might think that a guy [...]
I caught this bit while getting the boys ready this morning.
Maybe it's just me, but I fully expected to hear him say "Look at me, I'm a fucking cabbage."
So it may be a wee bit too early to tell, I may in fact be jinxing the whole thing by calling any sort of attention to it, but if the events of the last few weekends are any indicator, I may very well be on to some sort of [...]
...we have this brand new baby boy!
The little guy was born December 31st, 13 days after his given due date of the 18th. He kept us waiting a bit, but he knew there was a tax credit on the line, so he decided it was [...]
The time we're given on this planet is finite, and in the time that each of us is given, it's up to each of us to do what we have to do to be the people we want to be.
How's that for a cryptic opening?
Last night found me sitting [...]
For all you parents out there considering the idea of bringing a nanny into your employ, be sure you get the non-scary version. Guys like me will have to be content scaring our own kids.
It really is all about the editing.
I don't remember exactly when this pain in my lower back started. It might have been last week, it might have been three weeks ago, I'm just not sure. But it's been there a while. For the most part, the pain has been minor, more annoying than agonizing. Up to [...]
