gwendomama

• Because Some Secrets Can't Wait to Be Shared....

  [...]
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  Posted: December 14, 2009, 2:23pm EST
  by gwendomama

• Things recently uttered in court during which I had to maintain composure and not puke in my mouth:

  Number of comments: 3
  "I'm not going to pay child support because she keeps threatening to take our kids and move out of this jurisdiction."
  (Because that makes sense. And because our children can certainly afford to live here without any child support. And jurisdiction? Because there is no jurisdiction on me...I'm not [...]
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  Posted: December 13, 2009, 6:01pm EST
  by gwendomama

• Colossal Disney Swear Fail

  Number of comments: 2
  Okay, I still can't really tell you why I am here, but, after a day of dogs-and-cats type freezing rain, chilled-to-the-bone and whining kids (the OLDER ONES!), absolutely zero photo opportunities, and all day hotel TV, I must at least tell the funniest part so far.
  
  Last night,' [...]
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  Posted: December 07, 2009, 10:48pm EST
  by gwendomama

• There's a Waterfall On My Head

  Number of comments: 3
  I tried to stop swearing because of the Disneyland trip - bad form and the thousands of kids and all.
  But I have to say something.
  
  This is a fucking lie:
  
  [...]
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  Posted: December 07, 2009, 2:02pm EST
  by gwendomama

• It's Where the Magic Happens

  Number of comments: 5
  This post is coming to you from the most magical place on earth.
  
  How do I know this?
  
  The six hour car ride, the all expense-paid trip, the fireworks from my hotel room at 9:30pm, and my son Bubbles, the one who eats a grand total of eight [...]
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  Posted: December 07, 2009, 1:01am EST
  by gwendomama

• Family Court Gives Me Ennui

  Number of comments: 6
  The family court system is broken. Shocker.
  
  'Don't say anything negative about the other parent to a mediator' I have been told. Why would I say anything negative? The interview is about the children, right? All I want is for him to get some counseling like the rest' [...]
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  Posted: November 24, 2009, 4:24pm EST
  by gwendomama

• Bubbles' First Poem, (as dictated to me yesterday, randomly and all at once in the car)

  Number of comments: 2
  smoke
  fire
  house
  trees
  water
  sirens
  glass
  and hurt
  and sad
  and scratching
  monkey
  dogs
  arrows. [...]
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  Posted: November 16, 2009, 11:00am EST
  by gwendomama

• Is This A Soap Opera?

  Number of comments: 8
  The day he admits that his violent and unnecessary actions have negatively impacted our children, and that listening to our child scream, "Stop, Daddy! STOP!! Stop breaking mama's arm!!" should have been enough to stop him from continuing to hurt me, will be the day we move forward for our' [...]
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  Posted: November 15, 2009, 4:50pm EST
  by gwendomama

• How to Party Like A Pirate: At your fourth birthday party...

  Number of comments: 10
  Bubbles wanted a pirate party.
  Well really, he wanted a pirate party and then he changed it to a spiderman party and then superman with purple sparkly wings and then demanded live monkeys and giraffes and I just kept nodding and affirming and planning the pirate party. Because, OMG, I [...]
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  Posted: November 11, 2009, 9:55pm EST
  by gwendomama

• Key Lime Bars of Best Deliciousness

  Number of comments: 3
  Yum.
  
  
  Want to know how I made them?
  
  
  
  Because, really? Wow.
  They were delicious!!!
  
  
  
  
  Okay, fine.
  
  
  Here.
  [...]
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  Posted: November 08, 2009, 10:28pm EST
  by gwendomama

• We Made It!!

  Number of comments: 17
  
  This morning Bubbles woke up and asked me if today was The Big Day.
  
  Bubbles: Today is my birthday, Mama?
  Me: Yes! Today is your birthday!
  Bubbles: Today I am four?
  Me: Yes, today you are four! Happy Birthday!
  Bubbles: Oh, I'm four? I' [...]
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  Posted: November 01, 2009, 2:15pm EST
  by gwendomama

• Fish Oil in Peanut Butter? Really?

  Number of comments: 4
  I wrote this about fish oil and peanut butter and pleasant surprises. [...]
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  Posted: October 23, 2009, 11:20am EDT
  by gwendomama

• In Honor of Domestic Violence Awareness Month

  Number of comments: 6
  To the abuser;
  If you want to apologize to your victim, I mean really apologize (as in, 'you have genuine feelings of remorse'), here is my advice to you.
  Do not ever follow up your apology with a 'but...', thus rendering it no longer valid.
  Do not [...]
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  Posted: October 20, 2009, 12:34pm EDT
  by gwendomama

• Sledgehammer

  Number of comments: 6
  Everything is fine, nothing to see over here.
  
  Yes, I know many of you know we went back to court today.
  
  Nothing happened - there was not enough information offered today for a ruling, so we are going back on Nov 13th, with a bit of mediation sprinkled [...]
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  Posted: October 19, 2009, 5:41pm EDT
  by gwendomama

• All I want for my birthday is some heat, please.

  Number of comments: 9
  Bubbles just told me that his birthday plans have changed. I mean sure, we have been waffling between pirate hunt and safari hunt for the time killing events theme of the party, but there's more to it than that.
  
  He realized today, while putting away his piles of toys' [...]
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  Posted: October 18, 2009, 4:56pm EDT
  by gwendomama

• Chickens Come and Chickens Go

  Number of comments: 2
  So, yesterday Supergirl stayed home from school, with a slight cold (cough cough). She was spending more time running with the chickens than lying in bed sipping tea, so I kept threatening to take her to school. At around 11:30 I told her to put the chickens away, so we [...]
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  Posted: October 17, 2009, 1:10pm EDT
  by gwendomama

• Definitely NOT Parent's Choice Toy Award Material...

  Number of comments: 6
  I am in shock.
  
  Bubbles loves his 'guys' more than any other toys. Sure, he loves his rescue heroes, and his trains, but not as much as his 'guys'. Guys are tiny and have many snippety-snappy accessories and come in blue boxes. Playmobil, with its attention to [...]
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  Posted: October 12, 2009, 4:09pm EDT
  by gwendomama

• Apraxia in Action: Again

  Number of comments: 5
  So, we love to go to the thrift store on Tuesdays, because it is half price day.
  We got this totally lame awesome find for only $2.5o the other day, and Bubbles is in love with it's archaic attractions. We start with just the word 'flamingos', which in some' [...]
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  Posted: October 12, 2009, 12:01am EDT
  by gwendomama

• Loser Fortune Cookie

  Number of comments: 4
  Unfortunately this was not my cookie:
  
  
  
  Fortunately, my friend let me take a picture of it..... [...]
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  Posted: October 10, 2009, 12:54pm EDT
  by gwendomama

• Chocolate Sushi (will win you friends and influence people)

  Number of comments: 10
  Re-posted because my favorite foodie site published this today!! (And because I wanted to feel all kinds of fabulous today.)
  
  
  
  
  I am so freaking clever, can I just say that?
  Yes, I can.
  When I heard about this place, I knew that [...]
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  Posted: October 09, 2009, 2:36pm EDT
  by gwendomama

• Time Does Not Heal ALL Wounds

  Number of comments: 18
  I'm frustrated. I know he reads this blog (oh, hi there), and because of this I probably post more video of the kids than I would have, pre-split.
  
  But he reads every word as well, and where the blog was originally beneficial for him, it has become now a' [...]
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  Posted: October 06, 2009, 1:58pm EDT
  by gwendomama

• I Barely Flinched (and then I had to giggle, because this is what my life has become)

  Number of comments: 7
  Yesterday morning as I dropped her off at school:
  
  
  Supergirl: Mama! I told just one person about how you and Daddy had a big fight and then Daddy hurt you, is that okay?
  Me: Umm, it's okay. But who did you tell?
  Supergirl: Jeff. Because he sits next' [...]
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  Posted: September 27, 2009, 12:39am EDT
  by gwendomama

• Yesterday I had an epiphany.

  Number of comments: 36
  I really did.
  Of course, as with most epiphanies, there is companion guilt.
  
  I have been riddled with fear and doubt. I have been the swiss cheese of confidence. I have been in anguish over my childrens' reactions to witnessing violence and living with the ensuing fallout. I have' [...]
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  Posted: September 19, 2009, 12:31pm EDT
  by gwendomama

• One Goof, Seeking His Ball...

  Number of comments: 10
  While walking the 1/4 mile down the road to the fire team picnic (thanks for saving our mountain!), Bubbles heard the music and announced that his ears were singing, his mouth was singing, and his feet were singing. When I pulled out the camera, this is what he had to [...]
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  Posted: September 13, 2009, 11:56am EDT
  by gwendomama

• Teaching Responsibility in the Throes of Upheaval

  Number of comments: 4
  Supergirl has had some problems with responsibility lately. I guess not so much 'problems' as it would be 'slow to learn', and I realized that I need to tighten up on that end, or she will be 'Responsibility Challenged', and I would like to know that I tried.
  
  There [...]
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  Posted: September 12, 2009, 11:15pm EDT
  by gwendomama

• File This Under: Things I Never Thought I'd Say

  Number of comments: 13
  I was lucky enough to share a birthday dinner last night with Jennygrace and Grace.
  
  I brought a cake:
  
  
  
  
  Grace took this picture as we were too stuffed to move wrapping up dinner with some surprise birthday tweeting:
  
  [...]
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  Posted: September 11, 2009, 2:25pm EDT
  by gwendomama

• Spiderman Theme Song Debate

  Number of comments: 1
  So Bubbles and his buddy, Orion, have a lot in common, beginning with their shared love of superheroes, especially The Best Superhero, Spiderman.
  
  Much to Bubbles' excitement, Orion came to visit this weekend to 'pway wif toys and share the guys'!!
  
  They then sat down to sing, and' [...]
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  Posted: September 08, 2009, 1:56pm EDT
  by gwendomama

• Apraxia Boy at New Preschool

  Number of comments: 5
  Bubbles, after shaking his teacher's hand goodbye at the end of circle time (oh yes, I do love that manners are included in preschool!): MAMA!! I have a GREAT school! I have a great day at my school!
  
  Me: Oh, that makes me so happy to hear! You like' [...]
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  Posted: September 04, 2009, 8:44pm EDT
  by gwendomama

• You Haven't Lived Until You've Seen A 3 yr old Sing ABBA

  Number of comments: 10
  My little guy Bubbles has become obsessed with the movie, Mamma Mia. He thinks he is Pierce Brosnan, which is even funnier to me, because we met him (but I had no idea who he was.... looooong story) when I was barely pregnant with Bubbles.
  
  Apparently in this scene, [...]
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  Posted: August 30, 2009, 11:37pm EDT
  by gwendomama

• First Day of School: We got through it.

  Number of comments: 7
  Today was an awesome day. Or it should have been. I pretended it was; I am pretty sure my kids didn't notice I was crying...though they probably did notice that I was short with them this morning to stop changing shirts and ZOMG you are kidding you lost your mp4' [...]
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  Posted: August 27, 2009, 3:33pm EDT
  by gwendomama

• Apraxia Update

  Number of comments: 7
  I haven't posted much about Bubbles' Apraxia lately, mostly because he is kicking Apraxia's ass. His articulation still leaves much to be desired, but his vocabulary and sentence structure are skyrocketing. Here are a few 'soundbytes' from our recent conversations.
  
  
  Last week, as I was filling out some' [...]
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  Posted: August 22, 2009, 5:05pm EDT
  by gwendomama

• Thursday, August 13th: The day my mountain caught on fire...Again.

  Number of comments: 14
  
  The Fire.
  
  What can I say? I had hit my very personal emotional wall the night before. Not wanting to be his neighbor; with him insisting on being my neighbor. The person who 'didn't do anything wrong', even though I have clear memory of' [...]
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  Posted: August 20, 2009, 2:48pm EDT
  by gwendomama

• More Big Fun (Or: How I spent my summer with no money)

  Number of comments: 7
  I am thinking about which Big Fun to have next....
  
  
  
  We went to Big Fun Park (also known as 6 Flags) yesterday. The last time we were there was on April 10th, the day before 'The Incident', so it was certainly a [...]
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  Posted: August 07, 2009, 1:38pm EDT
  by gwendomama

• Please, Don't Insult Me; I Didn't Ask to Be Here in This Place.

  Number of comments: 22
  
  
  I have heard a few of Xdude's friends and/or former friends express their surprise over the fact that he could be violent or confrontational.
  
  I have heard things such as, 'Xdude was Zen and so how could he have done this?' I have [...]
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  Posted: July 31, 2009, 7:24pm EDT
  by gwendomama

• Baby Stellan

  Number of comments: 1
  
  
  Please hold this child close to your hearts and thoughts and even your prayers.
  
  And send his mama [...]
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  Posted: July 27, 2009, 8:43pm EDT
  by gwendomama

• If Babies Were Rainbows....Oh yeah...They Totally Are

  Number of comments: 13
  My baby brother and his wife (who did all the work, incidentally) produced this delicious little nugget of life yesterday.
  
  
  I know...try not to lick your screen....
  
  
  His name is Xander. 6lbs, 7oz.
  
  Welcome him to the world, yo?
  
  
  [...]
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  Posted: July 27, 2009, 12:39am EDT
  by gwendomama

• Tastes Like Chicken

  Number of comments: 2
  Supergirl's friend, Emily, walks into the house with a chicken (the one we call 'Nugget') under her arm, calling my name.
  
  "Emily! Stop! Stop!"
  "But Gwendomama..."
  "No, Emily! Please no chickens in the house!"
  "But Gwe-..."
  "No, honey, really! Back up, you need to go out of the house" [...]
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  Posted: July 23, 2009, 8:03pm EDT
  by gwendomama

• Do You Have A Parenting Mantra?

  Number of comments: 14
  Supergirl's birthday is tomorrow. She will be eight years old.
  My job is to make her birthday awesomeness even if her world has been turned upside down. Even if she wishes every night so hard that she, my little lithe fragile faerie child, could change the events that happened three [...]
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  Posted: July 19, 2009, 2:51pm EDT
  by gwendomama

• WTF?

  Number of comments: 5
  I am not sure what to say about this.
  
  I mean, it is disturbing, people throwing things at each other, and there is nothing funny about domestic violence.....but I can't get the vision of these two hurling cheetos at each other in a violent rage.
  And then, how' [...]
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  Posted: July 04, 2009, 1:34pm EDT
  by gwendomama

• Breakfast of Champions (always includes cookies)

  Number of comments: 5
  Seriously, how do I get this lucky?
  
  Across the street from the children's therapist is a local tradition, and Supergirl and I got to share a breakfast like this today:
  
  Coffee (for me), The Duke (cream cheese, raspberry jam, toasted cashews) (for me), [...]
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  Posted: July 03, 2009, 1:39pm EDT
  by gwendomama

• And This Is a Day I 'Don't Work...'

  Number of comments: 15
  5:51 am - Wake up to Bubbles plaintively issuing his morning credo, "Mama. No say 'no ootine milk'! I want ootine milk.:
  5:52 - remind Bubbles for the 18th time that no, I will not get him ootine milk because it is too early.
  5:53 - Tell Bubbles that" [...]
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  Posted: June 30, 2009, 6:20pm EDT
  by gwendomama

• Apraxia Update, or: The Summer with Apraxia Challenge

  Number of comments: 3
  Yesterday was an Apraxia Triple Challenge Adventure.
  
  Can you hear the cheering? That was for me, for making it through the day.
  
  Bubbles is not adjusting well to his reduction in speech therapy hours from three/per week to one/per week. He is going through this awesome fun phase [...]
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  Posted: June 25, 2009, 3:03pm EDT
  by gwendomama

• Conflict of Empathy

  Number of comments: 8
  I feel badly for him, really do.
  Even with the betrayal I feel by him, and the anger I feel in response to him justifying his actions, and calling them 'defensible'. Even with realization that he could and would do it again, considering it was 'defensible', and even with the [...]
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  Posted: June 22, 2009, 2:35pm EDT
  by gwendomama

• Censorship IS a Bitch.

  Number of comments: 34
  So, just so we all know, I am being censored by an angry 55 yr old woman.
  I was the recipient of a spewing, scathing warning phoned in by yet another of his family members. I was warned that someone is just waiting for me to screw up illegally on [...]
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  Posted: June 20, 2009, 1:10pm EDT
  by gwendomama

• Apraxia Update

  Number of comments: 5
  Well, Bubbles no longer has Apraxia tests so high that he currently tests above the level which meets the criteria for the diagnosis of Apraxia.
  
  :::::blink blink blink::::
  
  
  He does, most likely still have Apraxia, and also perhaps a phonological disorder, which only appears as a [...]
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  Posted: June 16, 2009, 3:11pm EDT
  by gwendomama

• You Have the Right to Remain Silent (hint hint)

  Number of comments: 12
  Today, the father of my children, the man who choked me to the floor (TWICE!) two months ago while telling me how long it was in coming, the man who has told anyone who will listen about how he just 'wants to do what it takes to be a family' [...]
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  Posted: June 15, 2009, 4:55pm EDT
  by gwendomama

• I am worried too....

  Number of comments: 13
  I am here.
  
  Family court is coming up, so you won't hear much from me right now.
  
  There is very little news, other than the passive aggressive belligerence continues. His mail still comes here. No forwarding address. No attempt at a kind approach to moving his things.' [...]
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  Posted: June 11, 2009, 6:31pm EDT
  by gwendomama

• Tongue-Biting FAIL

  Number of comments: 25
  Trying to bite my tongue here, but seriously being tested.
  He won't move his stuff out - basically refuses to get his things - which makes no sense to me as I am being beyond patient and what does he plan on doing with them if they are there?
  And' [...]
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  Posted: June 03, 2009, 6:08pm EDT
  

• Art By Children; Special Edition

  Number of comments: 18
  Bubbles, in his new obsession with superheroes, has taken to drawing on himself.
  We have to hide all the markers.
  It started out innocent enough - he drew on himself at school and told everyone he was Spiderman. Which? Almost believable! Because actually, if you look at Spidey's costume, it' [...]
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  Posted: June 02, 2009, 12:09pm EDT
  by gwendomama

• Bubbles vs. Apraxia

  Number of comments: 0
  Apraxia update over here today!
  
  Please stop by..... [...]
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  Posted: June 01, 2009, 2:35pm EDT
  by gwendomama

• What was slipping away, fell like a stone.

  Number of comments: 10
  I replay what happened; sometimes the memory pops into my vision and plays involuntarily, sometimes I choose to review it.
  
  I am drawn to recall a certain moment again and again. There was so much that happened in that moment; so much that could have possibly changed the [...]
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  Posted: May 30, 2009, 8:07pm EDT
  

• How Far is Too Far?

  Number of comments: 20
  I guess I cannot say that I am surprised.
  
  I mean, I suppose it's somewhat expected that he may have decided what boundaries are acceptable for me - boundaries are only to be set by him - and I guess he decided that he will live next door to' [...]
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  Posted: May 29, 2009, 2:06pm EDT
  

• Super-Spider-Bat-Man Hero Boy

  Number of comments: 11
  My boy has been obsessed with superheroes lately.
  
  He works through the good vs. evil; the right vs. wrong every day now in his play. This is sudden, and fierce, and awesome.
  (And, considering the circumstances, highly appropriate!)
  
  He is serious about this stuff.
  
  If a [...]
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  Posted: May 27, 2009, 10:32pm EDT
  

• Hello, California Legal System??

  Number of comments: 7
  I would like to mention this little detail about restraining and stay-away orders....
  
  He knows where I am. He knows.
  
  But do I know where he is?
  No, I do not.
  
  Has he volunteered this information, in the interest of answering the questions? Or in the [...]
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  Posted: May 26, 2009, 12:28am EDT
  by gwendomama

• Definitely NOT Talkin 'bout The Yellow Brick Road When I say 'Path'

  Number of comments: 10
  This has been difficult, I won't lie to you.
  
  My children have questions. Of course they do, they are teh frackin' brilliant.
  I try not to answer anything more than they ask.
  
  Supergirl knows a little bit (who am I fooling?) probably a good deal of what happened; [...]
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  Posted: May 25, 2009, 12:59am EDT
  

• What Happened?

  Number of comments: 39
  I take a risk in not hiding. But the internet has held me up, and I owe you my truth.
  
  
  We were fighting.
  Verbally fighting.
  
  I could tell you the gory details of what it was about, but the more I look at it, the less relevant [...]
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  Posted: May 19, 2009, 6:40pm EDT
  by gwendomama

• Thank You, Internet

  Number of comments: 22
  While some may say this is wrong - this sharing, this writing, this blog - I have to say that I feel part of one amazingly strong community.
  I am beyond lucky to have such a supportive group of friends, IRL and URL.
  
  Internet, you are saving my ass. [...]
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  Posted: May 16, 2009, 3:23pm EDT
  

• Be Careful What You Don't Tell People

  Number of comments: 37
  I feel so overwhelmingly sad right now.
  
  I can hardly find the 'poetic' and 'cryptic' words right now (which apparently describe my writing so well) to even write about this, as my style of writing and the mere fact that I do write, were attempted to be used against [...]
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  Posted: May 14, 2009, 9:50pm EDT
  

• So, it's May 11th again.

  Number of comments: 11
  So, I went to court today.
  
  
  Happy Dead Baby Anniversary Day to me!!!
  
  
  ::::::sigh:::::::
  
  
  
  
  Nothing happened today.
  Other than the fact that I had to see him.
  It was shakey time.
  
  
  
  Trial next week. [...]
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  Posted: May 11, 2009, 8:23pm EDT
  

• Trying So Hard to Wrap My Brain Around This...

  Number of comments: 25
  He used all our household funds to bail himself out. He told me he had paid the rent and he had not. He told me he had paid the utilities for months: Lies.
  
  So, he used all that money for bail and now wonders why I would do this [...]
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  Posted: May 06, 2009, 4:34pm EDT
  

• Snippets

  Number of comments: 4
  I will be on trial, though it is not my trial.
  
  I will be put on the witness stand (cage), though I am not the one who is on trial.
  
  I will have to testify. He will not. He may choose to, but the choice is not mine.
  [...]
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  Posted: May 06, 2009, 1:47am EDT
  

• Just Wondering........

  Number of comments: 3
  Would it be inappropriate if I sent a donation to Global Giving in her name?
  Perhaps one for battered women? Domestic abuse education? Educate and empower women? [...]
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  Posted: May 05, 2009, 2:14pm EDT
  

• Clusterfreak Which is PRIVATIZED

  Number of comments: 7
  Had to go private again.
  
  I know I have done nothing wrong, but the defense will try to take anything I have written and use it against me, out of context.
  
  He's taking it to trial.
  
  I still cannot say very much....
  
  
  But yes,' [...]
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  Posted: May 05, 2009, 1:04am EDT
  

• I just found this in my inbox....

  Number of comments: 8
  
  
  
  Hi Julie!
  
  I'm a big fan that's read your blog regularly, and thought I would pass along an iphone application I just launched that is great for parents and kids called The Animalizer.
  
  The app is a super simple concept, easy to use, and viral- [...]
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  Posted: May 03, 2009, 4:34pm EDT
  by gwendomama

• I'm BACK!

  Number of comments: 23
  I've done nothing wrong.
  
  I refuse to hide.' [...]
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  Posted: May 02, 2009, 12:31am EDT
  

• I am only going to do this once....

  Number of comments: 41
  
  
  
  And with much shame associated.....
  
  
  
  
  
  
  [...]
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  Posted: April 29, 2009, 2:28am EDT
  

• File This Under Clusterfreak

  Number of comments: 18
  The envelope was quite thin; it indicated a problem.
  It wasn't addressed to me, but it came to my house, and it is my electricity now.
  I opened it.
  My power will be shut off in 48 hours, because the bills he told me he had been paying, he had' [...]
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  Posted: April 28, 2009, 2:41pm EDT
  

• Fallout

  Number of comments: 15
  5/14/09 EDITED TO CLARIFY HERE:
  No, I am NOT comparing myself to a Holocaust victim. Context, people.
  Former Dh and his sister's mother IS an actual, real, live Holocaust survivor. She is an amazing woman, however her own ghosts have certainly influenced her parenting and survival in this lifetime. I' [...]
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  Posted: April 28, 2009, 3:11am EDT
  

• Statistically speaking...this would be a 'touche'

  Number of comments: 14
  I told my friend that I believe we have stayed together through so much because we had lost Elijah.
  
  She said, "It is usually the other way around. People split up after a child dies."
  
  I said, "I know! I guess we were just dedicated to" [...]
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  Posted: April 18, 2009, 1:24am EDT
  by gwendomama

• I don't even know if I should be publishing this....

  Number of comments: 42
  I walk my son to his preschool class and sign him in. I have something pink and important in my hand, and I need to show his teacher....outside, privately. Of course she needs to tell the substitute for the day, as the head teacher is gone. The sub turns out [...]
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  Posted: April 15, 2009, 3:45am EDT
  

• About Which I Can Not Post

  Number of comments: 28
  Domestic violence. [...]
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  Posted: April 14, 2009, 2:17am EDT
  

• New Post at Hopeful Parents

  Number of comments: 2
  I wrote this.
  
  Over here.
  
  It's not about dead baby cake, I promise.
  Just about dead baby birthdays.' [...]
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  Posted: April 01, 2009, 5:24pm EDT
  

• That Little Boy Stole A Big Piece of My Heart

  Number of comments: 12
  In the recently discovered files of pictures, I found this priceless triptych:
  
  
  Elijah was between 5 and 7 days old, living in the NICU, and about to meet his sister:
  
  
  
  Supergirl was only twenty months old at that time. Closer to [...]
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  Posted: April 01, 2009, 2:54am EDT
  

• Happy Birthday Tiny Boy

  Number of comments: 19
  Elijah Brooklyn
  3-31-03 - 5-11-04
  
  
  
  
  
  
  We miss you so much.
  [...]
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  Posted: March 31, 2009, 1:02pm EDT
  

• My Three Year Old Thinks He's Howard Hughes

  Number of comments: 11
  Bubbles is very independent. Forced by apraxia, and motivated by his marvelous personality, he will help himself before he asks for help, such as: bring a box of cereal to me if he wants some, and run back out of the room to get a bowl if he forgot one.
  [...]
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  Posted: March 29, 2009, 10:08pm EDT
  

• We Picked Up Some Chicks...

  Number of comments: 8
  We have four new additions to the family, and they are only three days old:
  
  
  
  
  
  Allow me to introduce you to Tiny (re-named Lucky after the heat lamp fell on her and almost broiled her and she survived). (Do not, for [...]
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  Posted: March 29, 2009, 3:57pm EDT
  

• Do not read this if the words 'dead baby cake' offend you...

  Number of comments: 6
  The Bloggess, well-known by everyone for being one who, err.....turns on.....many things (like light switches!) and people (and sheep, and puppies), has turned me on to this video site.
  
  And just in time too.
  
  
  Let me point out, that while Jenny's movie is funny,' [...]
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  Posted: March 27, 2009, 4:28pm EDT
  

• Dead Baby Cake

  Number of comments: 10
  So, I have to write this. I am also going to remind a certain someone that she is not being made fun of here, rather, has given me some comedic relief material in a dry period.
  
  I was having a 'chat' with my innernet friend and one of the [...]
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  Posted: March 27, 2009, 10:05am EDT
  

• There is nothing poetic about dead baby anniversaries

  Number of comments: 10
  Pissed.
  
  You would think that I would just get it by now, not have any expectation, and reduce potential for being pissed.
  But no, here we still are for some reason, and I'm pissed.
  
  I ask for nothing, or so very little. Yet I am wrung out.
  [...]
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  Posted: March 26, 2009, 5:49pm EDT
  

• This Drama is Brought to You by My Girlie Bits

  Number of comments: 14
  Let's just start with some simple facts today. You can put them together in a story however you wish.
  
  This time of year is always, in some form, anxiety-provoking for Gwendomama. This is in contrast to me the rest of the time; though some would consider me high-strung,' [...]
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  Posted: March 20, 2009, 4:42pm EDT
  

• Leapfrog Ball Dance in Action

  Number of comments: 7
  Bubbles LOVES phonics, and the word has gotten out.
  So, even though Leapfrog has yet to lobby Apraxia-Boy as their poster child, my peeps know what my little guy likes.
  
  So a Big Thank You, to MamaDeb, who re-appropriated this awesome alphabet/phonics 'discovery ball' from her garage [...]
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  Posted: March 18, 2009, 11:23pm EDT
  

• Parenting: Instilling Responsibility, Despite AIG

  Number of comments: 8
  Supergirl has been getting herself into some time-outs lately that have not seemed to do any good. She spends the entire time hurling blame at us for putting her there, rather than taking responsibility for making a poor choice and moving forward. She ends up in time-out for an hour, [...]
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  Posted: March 16, 2009, 7:50pm EDT
  by gwendomama

• Kangaroo Ninja Attack Alert

  Number of comments: 2
  Oh my.
  
  Things have gone from bad to worse for the infamous rumors which depict Australia as a 'highly dangerous place', with the recent (entirely unprovoked!) kangaroo attack in Garran, a suburb of the capital city of Australia, Canberra.
  
  
  "My initial thought" [...]
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  Posted: March 13, 2009, 1:10am EDT
  by gwendomama

• The Mamas Rockband Challenge

  Number of comments: 6
  Okay, if you go to a rather shady shabby looking thrift store to look for some very unlikely child sized ski pants, just because it is the only thrift store near your job (which is not near your home), and you just happen to be there with your kickass [...]
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  Posted: March 12, 2009, 10:00am EDT
  

• Apraxia in Action

  Number of comments: 2
  Apraxia update on Bubbles over here today.
  
  He rocks. [...]
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  Posted: March 12, 2009, 1:19am EDT
  

• Another Photo Documentary (of DANGER)

  Number of comments: 12
  We lit one of these:
  
  
  In here:
  
  
  
  
  And it was very hot. Too hot. Something was wrong. The pipe was glowing. It shot an ember out the side onto a highly contentious and flammable object.
  
  [...]
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  Posted: March 07, 2009, 11:41pm EST
  

• If You Still Think I Am Genteel In Any Way....Avert Your Eyes.

  Number of comments: 10
  I can't help myself.
  
  Sharing this story is a sure sign that I've lost all remaining shreds of decency.
  But let's just stop pretending shall we?
  
  
  
  California Unified Nether Temple Society
  
  The BOS was extolling the virtues of the California Womens Health program, how great' [...]
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  Posted: March 04, 2009, 5:48pm EST
  

• Parenting Lessons: In Progress

  Number of comments: 9
  Yesterday was a challenge to my parenting expertise stamina.
  Supergirl was awful. Sassy, insolent, unrepentant.
  She spent the afternoon in time-outs which were extended before they were served.
  I wanted to smack her around a bit, but we don't do that.
  
  Finally, by dinnertime, she would just not stop' [...]
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  Posted: March 02, 2009, 6:53pm EST
  

• Five Years Later; Nothing Poignant in Repetition

  Number of comments: 10
  [Cross-posted here.]
  
  Today marks the first day of the fifth year of grief season*. I would call it 'grief month', but when your kid dies just five weeks after their (only) birthday, all of those important anniversaries like birthday and deathday run together, and calling it 'grief season' [...]
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  Posted: March 01, 2009, 6:10pm EST
  

• Ponder This Too

  Number of comments: 3
  
  Same place, different view.
  [...]
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  Posted: February 28, 2009, 12:40pm EST
  

• Ponder This

  Number of comments: 3
  
  
  
  
  Bonus points if you can name that place. Your prize? You get to bask in the knowledge that you are right, just like you always knew you were. [...]
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  Posted: February 27, 2009, 11:03pm EST
  

• In Like A Sneaky- Cave-Dwelling Lion

  Number of comments: 16
  I just realized that February is almost over, and greeted that thought with a cold chill and deep dread.
  
  And then I responded to that thought with, 'Come ON get over your bad-ass moping self already. You can't have an annual springtime depression. If you can see it coming, [...]
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  Posted: February 26, 2009, 6:18pm EST
  

• My Blog Ran Away

  Number of comments: 6
  We're sorry...

  ... but your query looks similar to automated requests from a computer virus or spyware application. To protect our users, we can't process your request right now.

  
  

  
  

  
  
  

  Umm, well okay then.

  That is what happened to me when I tried to go [...]

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  Posted: February 26, 2009, 1:49pm EST
  

• My Fainting Couch Fantasy

  Number of comments: 9
  Okay, in my daily Craigslist search for something to fill the void left by the Christmas tree a chaise to replace the crappy chair I refuse to return to that spot, I found a fainting couch.
  Seriously, I am in love.
  
  
  Not sure if I am more [...]
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  Posted: February 23, 2009, 7:39pm EST
  by gwendomama

• Sunday Link Love

  Number of comments: 2
  The good:
  I have long had a fascination with anything Hawaiian, and although Hansen's Disease is most certainly not of Hawaiian origin, what happened on Molokai is both mind-bendingly horrifying and intriguing.
  My favorite books are a combination of books; for me the read was nearly a life-changing event.
  [...]
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  Posted: February 22, 2009, 2:27pm EST
  by gwendomama

• We Have A Fear of Big Cats In This Family

  Number of comments: 6
  
  
  We have been lucky enough to stay at a very generous friend's cliff house on the north Sonoma coast - it is the perfect getaway for a weekend, and we spend our time soaking in the oversize hot tub, playing games with the kids' [...]
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  Posted: February 18, 2009, 2:54pm EST
  

• Anthropologetic

  Number of comments: 12
  Well, it's a sad thing for me to announce, but this recession depression has gotten the best of us, and we have to move back to Grammie's farm.
  
  It's tragic, because we can't fit too much in the truck, and we'll have to get rid of most of our' [...]
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  Posted: February 09, 2009, 9:51am EST
  

• Look What I Found!

  Number of comments: 9
  
  My baby!
  
  
  
  
  
  
  (And to think that someone made fun of me for taking this picture way back when....)
  [...]
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  Posted: February 08, 2009, 7:06pm EST
  

• Got My Head In His Cloud Again

  Number of comments: 16
  I recently found a huge file of photos of Elijah. I had either forgotten about them or convinced myself that they didn't exist....who knows.
  I can hardly describe what finding these has felt like....a gift...a peace....a stirring....a mindfuck...another unwanted but polite visit from Grief....
  
  A mother.
  I was his' [...]
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  Posted: February 03, 2009, 2:48pm EST
  

• Art By Children; Installment ...#3?

  Number of comments: 2
  I let Bubbles go outside with three animals in his hand.
  Thirty minutes later, this is what I found:
  
  (Sorry if it's blurry; I was laughing pretty hard for 9:00 am!)
  
  Seriously. I am not the artist.
  I might or might not have' [...]
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  Posted: February 02, 2009, 8:24pm EST
  by gwendomama