Cheeky Lotus

• So This Is Goodbye

  As you have all probably heard by now, Club Mom is shutting down its blogs. Honestly, this is very good timing for me personally. My plate is overflowing with responsibility and posting here was starting to become nearly impossible. As my infrequency in said posting can attest to. It feels... [...]
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  Posted: December 08, 2007, 8:50pm EST
  by Lena

• Now For My Next Anticlimactic Trick!

  Well. Well. Well. How VERY interesting. It appears that you have children from the ages of... (DRUM ROLL PLEASE) two weeks to eighteen years old! How very...broad of you, Internet. Despite my efforts to be useful and applicable in my writing and all market research-y I have basically learned that... [...]
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  Posted: November 07, 2007, 9:31pm EST
  by Lena

• I'll Ask the Questions Around Here

  Can you all just be as helpful as kittens and answer this wee question: How old are your kids? How rude of me not to ask sooner! My very efficient assistant shall collect your answers and get riiiiight back to you. [...]
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  Posted: November 06, 2007, 8:27pm EST
  by Lena

• Also, I Would Have Accepted Snakes*

  So, did everyone have a chance to get their comments in? Hmm? Everyone? (See, how I cleverly pretended I was waiting on you when in actuality you've been waiting on me? I know. How sneaky. Do you ever do that to your husband? Come downstairs where he's been passing the... [...]
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  Posted: November 05, 2007, 8:37pm EST
  by Lena

• Breaking News

  I started to write about the fires here at Club Mom, but realized that is a subject better suited for my personal blog, so if you would like to know how I'm doing feel free to take a jaunt over yonder. Obviously, I still have hands. I know posting has... [...]
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  Posted: October 25, 2007, 3:40pm EDT
  by Lena

• Probably More Dramatic Than I Should Be

  So. Hi. I've been reading your comments as they come in on the last post and selfishly let it go another day because I so love all of your opinions. I find myself nodding going "Yep. Exactly" to almost all of them. You see the problem, don't you? I can... [...]
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  Posted: October 16, 2007, 3:51pm EDT
  by Lena

• Only In the OC Would Party Invitations Come With a Non-Disclosure Agreement

  Do you have your #2 pencil in hand? Here is your word problem: A mom you know is having a party for her 6 year old. She is only inviting 15 kids. So, she covertly hands out invites in the school parking lot. And in that invitation is an accompanying... [...]
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  Posted: October 12, 2007, 12:01am EDT
  by Lena

• Shower Me With Your Love**

  For those of you late to the party, I started to plan my pregnancy when I was about 12-ish years old. Does this terrify me since me own daughter is halfway to twelve? Um, YESITDOESTHANKYOUVERYMUCH. (I even remember when a distant acquaintance of my family's found out that their thirteen-year-old... [...]
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  Posted: October 09, 2007, 2:33pm EDT
  by Lena

• Short List of Things I Do Not Recommend

  1. Watching "The Bridges of Madison County" too close to your period. 2. The same month your only child starts Kindergarten. 3. While infertile. 4. And drinking a 2006 Trader Joe's Shiraz. One quote stopped me dead in my Ruffle-dipping tracks. Meryl Streep's character says, very haltingly: "Having children in... [...]
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  Posted: October 04, 2007, 2:39pm EDT
  by Lena

• The Unthinkable (Now with more thinking!)

  Yes, I put up this post the other day and then promptly took it down. Not because I doubted my reaction in my story, but because in the interest of brevity, I didn't describe all of the details involved in the situation. And when it comes to a subject of... [...]
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  Posted: October 01, 2007, 6:07pm EDT
  by Lena

• This Blog Should Give Her Plenty To Worry About

  When Savannah was about two years old she developed this obsession with gum. And I don't mean that she ate it. She counted it. And I don't mean that she counted it in a package. She counted it after being chewed and stuck underneath restaurant tables. Every dining experience would... [...]
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  Posted: September 25, 2007, 4:42pm EDT
  by Lena

• Moms Are Just Former High Schoolers With Stretch Marks

  No one warned me about The Drop Off. In all the Kindergarten Preparedness advice I received, you would think someone would have slipped in there "Oh, and by the way, you'll want to buy yourself some new clothes too. And take a shower. And have interesting things to say at... [...]
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  Posted: September 18, 2007, 3:00pm EDT
  by Lena

• Random House Come A-Knockin

  What do I think this is? Some sort of communist dictatorship where I can promise you lovely people a post and then turn around and produce nada zip zilch the next day? What an evil blog overlord I am. Really, there should be a coup to overthrow me. (I'm easily... [...]
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  Posted: September 13, 2007, 7:28pm EDT
  by Lena

• Lena and Kindergarten Sitting in a Tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G

  I LOVE KINDERGARTEN! I love it! I love everything about it! I love the way it looks at me. I love the way it makes me feel. Lena + Kindergarten 4 EVA! Anyway, moving on... I STILL LOVE KINDERGARTEN! Sorry, I can't help myself. Kindergarten has turned out to be... [...]
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  Posted: September 10, 2007, 3:08pm EDT
  by Lena