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first fruits

  • through the looking glass, and back again

    Number of comments: 11
    If you were obsessive bored enough to track down all the comments I've made on other people's blogs, over the last 5 years, you'd find more than a handful on the subject of Early Intervention. Somewhere along the way, they would move from theoretical support to personal endorsement.

    And' [...]
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    Posted: November 15, 2009, 12:08am EST
    by persephone

  • too long for twitter

    Number of comments: 5
    Scene: Aleph is trying to tell me something, but I can't understand him no matter how I try. The train needs to go fash? ...flash? ...fashed? ...frashed??? Aleph is in tears by the time I finally get it. FAST. Duh. Of course. I hug him, and talk about how frustrated' [...]
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    Posted: October 28, 2009, 10:22pm EDT
    by persephone

  • what exactly IS going on at preschool?

    Number of comments: 1
    Scene: watching one of Laurie Berkner's many "empty white room" music videos.

    ALEPH: Is that a classroom, Eema? I think they might be in a classroom.

    EEMA: Think so? Hmm. I don't see any tables and chairs.

    ALEPH: [look, don't try to best me at logic.] It's [...]
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    Posted: October 27, 2009, 10:28pm EDT
    by persephone

  • songbites

    Number of comments: 6
    So it appears I have not been blogging. In quite some time. I'm not sure why that happened, or how long it's likely to continue. For those of you missing your fix (what? at least one reader said she missed me!) (what?? okay, so she's related to me!!), I guess' [...]
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    Posted: October 14, 2009, 9:14pm EDT
    by persephone

  • i'll be wrapped around your finger

    Number of comments: 4
    Scene: one of the many disordered naps around here lately. Aleph woke up crying, lay down on the futon with me for a while, then crawled back in bed to sleep again. Bet was sleeping soundly, but couldn't go back to sleep once Aleph woke him up. He's still on [...]
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    Posted: September 18, 2009, 7:31am EDT
    by persephone

  • just possibly we should have put aleph with the older threes

    Number of comments: 0
    The first nursery newsletter included a poll of the children's* favorite classroom toys to play with:

    Yankel: "trucks and cars"
    Perel: "babies"
    Bayla: "boats"
    Shmuly: "tractors"
    Yitzy: "elephants"
    Aleph: "I like to play with things you can put together"
    Moishy: "trucks"
    Kayla: "blocks"

    *not their real names, obvs.[...]
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    Posted: September 15, 2009, 11:53pm EDT
    by persephone

  • oh. THIS is a nice statement. it's... LOTS of fun.

    Number of comments: 3
    ALEPH: [stopping mid-tantrum] Can I see if you have some uh, jewelry to put on?

    EEMA: Hee. Okay. What kind of jewelry do you think I should put on?

    ALEPH: I think some uh earrings, and maybe a necklace. I'll go see what you have.

    EEMA: Oh,' [...]
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    Posted: September 13, 2009, 2:56pm EDT
    by persephone

  • spin me another story, bet

    Number of comments: 0

    on nail biting:
    My finger got shorter. I ate part of it.

    on (completely innocuous) painting of daffodils:
    Why is that flower yelling? [how do you know it's yelling?] Its mouth is open. And it doesn't look happy.

    on sleep regression (this is pretty much how [...]
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    Posted: September 06, 2009, 10:36pm EDT
    by persephone

  • more tales of the davkanik*

    Number of comments: 3
    *also known as: Opposite Boy

    ALEPH: Can I have some cheese on my challah roll?

    EEMA: No, we're having cheese for lunch.

    ALEPH: But I need something to cover my butter.

    EEMA: You could have honey, or jam...

    ALEPH: [starting to smile] Just say one' [...]
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    Posted: September 06, 2009, 1:18am EDT
    by persephone

  • well, at least he knows what it's called?

    Number of comments: 0
    Scene: For not the first time in recent days, Aleph is about to tip over the rocking chair.

    EEMA: [glares] Don't. even. think about it.

    ALEPH: [glares back] I will think about it!

    EEMA: [pulls him onto lap for immobilization/hug] What is going on with you?
    [...]
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    Posted: September 02, 2009, 8:57pm EDT
    by persephone

  • zero to three: best of

    Number of comments: 4
    So this is probably not exactly what Rachel had in mind, but I don't think I have it in me to give comprehensive buying advice right now. Instead, here's a non-inclusive list of things we really enjoyed using (ymmv). Note: big-ticket items were almost all found secondhand in great [...]
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    Posted: August 27, 2009, 12:30am EDT
    by persephone

  • mini me

    Number of comments: 1
    Bet just brought a library book to the table "so I can read it while I'm eating."

    Excuse me while I expire from cuteness.' [...]
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    Posted: August 26, 2009, 12:52pm EDT
    by persephone

  • remedial twin parenting

    Number of comments: 4
    Note to idiot self: STOP BUYING two different toys, on the theory that they'll get more mileage out of switching when they're bored! All they want in the entire world these days is to parallel play. We will now need two of everything. The end. [...]
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    Posted: August 24, 2009, 11:37pm EDT
    by persephone

  • is there anything you boys want to tell me?

    Number of comments: 1
    part 1

    Scene: Bet takes a book to bed for naptime, flips through a few pages, and realizes he can't tell this story to himself. He starts to cry.

    BET: Eema, I need a different book!

    EEMA: I'm sorry Bet, you can't come out for another one.' [...]
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    Posted: August 23, 2009, 12:41am EDT
    by persephone

  • necessity is the toddler of invention

    Number of comments: 1
    We've had quite a time getting the boys to stay in bed at nap & bedtime, since they figured out our weak spot: toilet training. I am tired. Lance is tired. The boys MUST be tired, because they're sure doing a whole lot less sleeping.

    EEMA: Okay, does everyone [...]
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    Posted: August 21, 2009, 2:27pm EDT
    by persephone

  • related: what are we eating??

    Number of comments: 1
    We've had a pretty limited pantry up till now; in the first couple of weeks I got heartily sick of plain chicken, eggs, and cheese. And there's still a lot of plain vegetables in our menu - sliced avocado, steamed carrots, etc. But slowly I'm starting to find actual recipes' [...]
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    Posted: August 21, 2009, 11:17am EDT
    by persephone

  • state of the pantry: update

    Number of comments: 10
    Disclaimer: I'm thrilled that other people with nut allergies are finding this list useful. But please, PLEASE re-confirm all information for yourself!! We're doing the best we can, but especially for companies we called early on, I'm worried we might have blurred "nut-free equipment" with "nut-free facility."
    In any case,' [...]
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    Posted: August 18, 2009, 2:26pm EDT
    by persephone

  • reduced to sputtering

    Number of comments: 1
    Tensely awaiting morning so we can fire off a call to the baking powder manufacturer which was recommended on all the peanut-free allergy boards, but which I just heard processes tree nuts in the same facility.

    But- the- I- what??

    We've been using this brand and this' [...]
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    Posted: August 17, 2009, 2:10am EDT
    by persephone

  • little one lost

    Number of comments: 0
    Thinking of Chloe. [...]
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    Posted: August 16, 2009, 8:42am EDT
    by persephone

  • shhhhhhhhh, fool. you're giving away the PLAN

    Number of comments: 2
    Scene: Après standoff with small fry.

    ALEPH: How do I break you?

    EEMA: What?!

    ALEPH: I want to know how to break you.

    EEMA: Why do you want to know that?

    ALEPH: I need to know how you're made. So I know how to' [...]
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    Posted: August 10, 2009, 2:10pm EDT
    by persephone

  • insert joke here*

    Number of comments: 4
    LANCE: Aleph, you're not cooperating.

    ALEPH: Well, cooperating is not my best thing.


    *...self-knowledge: check

    ...but i AM very good at bossing!

    ...and you're not really lighting my profile right, either [...]
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    Posted: August 05, 2009, 12:04am EDT
    by persephone

  • lovely.

    Number of comments: 4
    Scene: New game across the breakfast table.

    BET: [shoots fist out toward Aleph] HIT YOU pretend!

    ALEPH: [shoots fist out toward Bet] HIT YOU pretend!

    *sigh*

    Might need to get these children karate lessons. Or at least a punching bag. [...]
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    Posted: August 04, 2009, 2:12am EDT
    by persephone

  • am srsly reconsidering this toilet training hype

    Number of comments: 3
    after being wakened at 4 AM by a small frantic apparition at bedside saying "I need to pee! I need to PEE!" with the monitor simultaneously shrieking, "wait! where did you GO??" [...]
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    Posted: August 02, 2009, 10:17am EDT
    by persephone

  • thank goodness shanna sent peanut-free chocolate

    Number of comments: 2
    What's more fun than finding one of your boys beating the other one on the head with a metal* Thomas when you're not looking?

    Having him stare you in the face while he beats the other one on the head the next time.

    Runner up: having the other [...]
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    Posted: July 29, 2009, 12:32am EDT
    by persephone

  • file under: unsubscribe. PLEASE.

    Number of comments: 2
    In an effort to refrain from saying all the things I'm THINKING about the latest ad pitch in my mailbox, I'm going to take One Tired Ema's advice. "You gotta blog about breasts more. You don't see anyone asking me to advertise for 40 days davening at the kotel."
    [...]
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    Posted: July 26, 2009, 7:29pm EDT
    by persephone

  • you know, if that's working for you, it works for me

    Number of comments: 1
    Scene: On our way to the basement to get the laundry. The boys are allowed to run ahead of me down the hall, as long as they stop when they get to the elevator.

    BET: [skids to a halt] IIIIIIIIIIIIII'm first!

    ALEPH: [right behind him] IIIIIIIIIIIIII'm pretend first![...]
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    Posted: July 22, 2009, 2:36am EDT
    by persephone

  • shout out

    Number of comments: 3
    Hi! Thanks for commenting, and for reading!

    Could I ask you a favor, though? Could you please pick a name to use when you comment here? Any name. If you can't settle on one, I'd be happy to hand them out. (Madeline? Betsy-Tacey? Eloise? er... Harold?)

    I [...]
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    Posted: July 21, 2009, 11:54am EDT
    by persephone

  • ohhhhhhhhh. well okay, then

    Number of comments: 1
    BET: But I like to bother Aleph! [...]
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    Posted: July 20, 2009, 5:56pm EDT
    by persephone

  • state of the pantry address

    Number of comments: 9
    Next question: "Aren't there lists of these things?" Yeah, sure there are peanut-free lists. But most of them are for snacks to send to school, not things to cook for dinner.

    And frankly I have no idea how people came up with some of them. Some seem based on' [...]
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    Posted: July 19, 2009, 12:00am EDT
    by persephone

  • abba, deer tamer

    Number of comments: 0
    The following is an amalgam of fact, legend, and the wild imagination of Bet. Bet wasn't even there when this happened. (Can you tell?)

    "Once upon a time, Aleph and Abba kissed the Torah [in shul], and then they went out to the parking lot, and there was a'" [...]
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    Posted: July 16, 2009, 9:28pm EDT
    by persephone

  • the secret

    Number of comments: 2
    Broke the news to my children today. Well, I think deep down they already knew, but they didn't want to face it.

    Here it is:

    EEMA

    CAN ONLY

    DO

    ONE THING

    AT A TIME.

    After an initial period of shock, disillusionment, life will' [...]
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    Posted: July 15, 2009, 11:15pm EDT
    by persephone

  • note to self: next time, sell tickets

    Number of comments: 3
    To the very pious children who stumbled on Aleph naked from the waist down in my parent's yard; then stood staring in a row, nervously fascinated half-smiles on their faces, whispering to each other (-Why are you looking? -I'm not looking! -[gasp] He put his hand on it!):

    I'm' [...]
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    Posted: July 13, 2009, 12:04am EDT
    by persephone

  • in funnier news

    Number of comments: 1
    Scene: Walking out of the subway.

    BET: Look, somebody dropped a cheerio!

    EEMA: Yeah, I guess they did.

    BET: Somebody's like, hey, where's my cheerio! [...]
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    Posted: July 08, 2009, 11:05pm EDT
    by persephone

  • PSA: but isn't carrying an epipen enough?

    Number of comments: 8
    After being asked almost the same (entirely reasonable, considering public awareness campaigns on the subject) question by both a sister and a good friend - not to mention reading the story of someone who was trained on when to give her child the epipen, but was never told to call [...]
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    Posted: July 07, 2009, 8:35pm EDT
    by persephone

  • disappointing the chilluns since: June 2009

    Number of comments: 4
    More on the doctor's plot (it thickens) and the other brother (he's keeping us hopping, too) later. In the meantime, a quick scene: Shabbat dinner. You may want to hum one of Aleph's favorite songs while you read.

    ***

    ALEPH: Is there [my favorite] butternut squash kugel?[...]
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    Posted: June 29, 2009, 5:15pm EDT
    by persephone

  • haven't QUITE got the hang of this yet

    Number of comments: 5
    Even when I think I know what I'm getting into, I don't.

    ***

    Dinner today: french toast. One of Aleph's surefire meals, dunked in Vermont maple syrup. Bread (label: lists allergens other than nuts), eggs, milk, cinnamon (oops! forgot to check it.)

    Time to serve it. Double [...]
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    Posted: June 23, 2009, 11:46pm EDT
    by persephone

  • the best defense is a good... wait, i think that's supposed to be me.

    Number of comments: 6
    Aleph, on being carried out to the ambulance: [wailing] Nooooooooo! I want to go to the rocking chair!

    Aleph, on being stuck in an ER bed for hours: When is this going to be finished? I can't wait to go home. [confidentially] How do we get out of here?[...]
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    Posted: June 22, 2009, 1:22am EDT
    by persephone

  • smart. aleck.

    Number of comments: 0
    ALEPH: Eema, can you can you can you-

    EEMA: I can't do anything right now. I am changing Bet's diaper.

    ALEPH: Well if you can't do anything, how can you change Bet's diaper? That's doing something.

    Seriously, how can these children not be toilet trained yet??? Aren't [...]
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    Posted: June 19, 2009, 4:51pm EDT
    by persephone

  • the world according to aleph

    Number of comments: 1
    I let the kids watch Bob the Builder today. Afterward, I heard Aleph singing the theme song.

    Of course, in Aleph's version, it goes like this:

    Can we fix it?
    NO WE CAN'T!

    Nobody who knows him would be the slightest bit surprised.' [...]
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    Posted: June 18, 2009, 10:02pm EDT
    by persephone

  • toilet training twins: take three

    Number of comments: 2
    OMG. Am running away to join circus.

    Pls have this taken care of by time I get back. Ok?thxbye. [...]
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    Posted: June 17, 2009, 5:52pm EDT
    by persephone

  • on today's agenda:

    Number of comments: 6
    send hard copy of complaint letter to AMA and NY Stateorder medic alert bracelet for Alephexpunge all traces of grownup peanut snacks from house
    expunge all traces of experience from my brainIf you know me at all, you know that I have a hard time bouncing back from trauma. I [...]
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    Posted: June 14, 2009, 11:44pm EDT
    by persephone

  • 2 peas in a pod

    Number of comments: 1
    The only reason anyone in our house is sleeping right now:

    the Peapod Plus

    I thought I was prepared for this day, really I did. What I didn't realize - until the side railings actually came off - was that these are useless on a non-Ikea' [...]
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    Posted: June 11, 2009, 11:20pm EDT
    by persephone

  • excitement of an entirely different sort

    Number of comments: 2
    Drumroll please:

    Aleph - finally - climbed out of his crib this morning.

    Climbing is a generous word for what was, if the reenactment can be believed, more of a perch on the railing + flying leap into space.

    Needless to say, railings are out of here.
    [...]
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    Posted: June 11, 2009, 11:17am EDT

  • what have we learned today, children?

    Number of comments: 9
    So Aleph had his long-awaited allergist appointment today. He was tested for, it seemed like, 40 different common as well as history-specific allergens.

    This is insane, by the way: they don't numb the skin beforehand, even for children, because it interferes with the results*; they test the child' [...]
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    Posted: June 09, 2009, 11:48pm EDT

  • we put the "dysfunctional" back in "fun"

    Number of comments: 0
    Scene: Harmless playing. Apparently too boring.

    BET: [apropos of nothing] NONONO NOTATALL, Aleph!

    ALEPH: [does his latest move: thrust hand out as if to hit Bet, but stop right before his face.]

    BET: Eema, Aleph is trying to hit me!

    EEMA: I hope think he's just' [...]
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    Posted: June 04, 2009, 6:48pm EDT
    by persephone

  • another bagel summit talks breakdown

    Number of comments: 1
    ALEPH: I want two halfs of bagel. I'll save one of them for you, Bet.

    BET: I don't want a half of bagel.

    ALEPH: Then I'm gonna eat two of them.

    BET: I want one! I want one!

    ALEPH: Then I will save one for you.[...]
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    Posted: June 03, 2009, 9:51am EDT
    by persephone

  • run for your lives!

    Enclosure: [download]
    Number of comments: 7
    My mother always loved when one of her kids turned 3, because when anyone asked how old we were, we always said "I'm FREE!"

    My kids go one better. "Hey Bet and Aleph, how old are you today?"

    "FLEE!!"
    ***

    And now, because I love you so' [...]
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    Posted: May 31, 2009, 9:26pm EDT

  • the cliffs of insanity

    Number of comments: 6
    Tell me it's normal to veer between joy and despair when parenting the almost-threes.

    Their developmental leaps are so amazing: suddenly they can catch a ball from several feet away, fix each other's train tracks, or sing a spontaneous (and on-key) duet of ma nishtana. And yet every time [...]
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    Posted: May 25, 2009, 12:49am EDT

  • calvin, meet hobbes

    Number of comments: 0
    ALEPH: Bet, is there any trouble on your tracks?

    BET: Nope.

    ALEPH: [hopeful grin] Are you going to MAKE any trouble? [...]
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    Posted: May 22, 2009, 5:10pm EDT

  • random things i felt you should know:

    Number of comments: 2
    Hello, my name is Persephone, and I would dearly love to own a frying pan which does not tilt down to one side, such that half the pan gets overdone while the other half is still raw.

    Also, a way to fry 3 batches of anything containing raw eggs, [...]
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    Posted: May 20, 2009, 1:00am EDT

  • irony: a play in two parts

    Number of comments: 1
    Scene: Bet is lying down while I change him. He presses one eyelid half closed with his thumb, then the other, and looks through them at me. I've never seen him do this before.

    EEMA: What are you doing?

    BET: [with a tiny smile] Now there's two of [...]
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    Posted: May 19, 2009, 10:49am EDT

  • i'm late! i'm late! for a very important date!

    Number of comments: 0
    Gah. I meant to put this up by Mother's Day, when it launched, but better late than never: please visit The Breastfeeding Experience, where Alanna collects first-person accounts of what it was like learning (or trying to learn) to breastfeed. Here's the blurb:
    "It's the 21st century, and we've" [...]
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    Posted: May 15, 2009, 3:30pm EDT

  • remedial twin parenting: FAIL

    Number of comments: 8
    I still get nervous the first time I take the boys someplace on my own, but for the most part, once I've done a dry run, I'm fine from then on. I may worry about each new store or playground, but I've been taking them to school on mass transit' [...]
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    Posted: May 11, 2009, 4:16pm EDT

  • psych!

    Number of comments: 1
    Scene: Bet is not thrilled with his old doggie pajamas, seeing as how Aleph has brand new lion ones.

    EEMA: Hey Bet, do you know what it says on your shirt? 'My best buddy.'

    BET: [starting to smile] Yeah.

    EEMA: Is the doggie your best buddy?

    [...]
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    Posted: May 11, 2009, 12:34am EDT

  • breakfast with prince charming

    Number of comments: 1
    ALEPH: Eema, I want another waffle.

    EEMA: I think you had enough waffle. It's time to eat something else. How about... blueberry yogurt?

    ALEPH: No.

    EEMA: Toast? Cheerios?

    ALEPH: No.

    EEMA: Ooh, I know. [winning smile] Milk?

    ALEPH: [winning smile PLUS raised eyebrows] Um,' [...]
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    Posted: May 06, 2009, 2:42pm EDT

  • criblog: anyone? anyone? bueller?

    Number of comments: 1
    Scene: Sometime after 7 AM.

    ALEPH: Bet, are you interested in waking up right now?

    *crickets* [...]
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    Posted: May 05, 2009, 5:00pm EDT

  • criblog: the song of the count

    Number of comments: 2
    Scene: I have no idea what Aleph is telling Bet he can't do - I hear the beginning of each sentence, but then he drops off to a mumble - but he sure has a long list of reasons why not.

    ALEPH: ...Third of all, blahblahblah. Fourth of all,' [...]
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    Posted: May 01, 2009, 12:05am EDT

  • recovery: maybe not 100%

    Number of comments: 1
    PERSEPHONE: So, did I tell you about the dream where I didn't realize we had a third baby, and no one was feeding him for days?

    LANCE: No.

    PERSEPHONE: Man, I haven't had that one in a long time. I don't know why I'm having it again.

    [...]
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    Posted: April 28, 2009, 12:49am EDT

  • uh oh

    Number of comments: 1
    have just discovered bricklink.

    quick somebody, disable the internet. [...]
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    Posted: April 27, 2009, 12:08am EDT

  • the boy has a point

    Number of comments: 6
    As you may recall, sleep has never been one of Aleph's strong points. He did, however, finally reach a stage where he slept until 7:30, then woke up and did other things besides cry. I didn't really care what; anything to not start my day with 1/2 an hour of [...]
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    Posted: April 23, 2009, 2:09pm EDT

  • speaking of child indoctrination*

    Number of comments: 2
    (oh. wasn't I?)

    Finally. One of my children has voluntarily requested a Finn Brothers song.

    Now I can die happy.' [...]
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    Posted: April 21, 2009, 9:15pm EDT

  • upset. with chocolate frosting on top.

    Number of comments: 14
    So we get to the YMHA this morning, finally back to preschool after our 2-week Passover break, and are greeted by the assistant teacher at the door. (Head teacher is out sick.) "N's mom sent in cupcakes for his birthday," she says. "They're homemade. Should I... just give Aleph &" [...]
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    Posted: April 20, 2009, 12:27pm EDT

  • file under: narrowly unsaid

    Number of comments: 7
    BET: Eema, why don't we have a sister?

    EEMA:

    EEMA: [um, what birds and bees?]

    EEMA: [I'm guessing "because day 5 blasts are more likely to be boys" is not what you're looking for?]

    EEMA: [oh, sweetie. you have no idea.]
    ' [...]
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    Posted: April 19, 2009, 11:03am EDT

  • riding in cars with aleph

    Number of comments: 1
    Scene: On the way to Bubby & Zayde for Pesach. The direct approach sometimes backfires in the car, so I haven't declared it naptime, but I'm about to put on a naptime CD.

    ALEPH: No Eema, no songs. It's better to sit quietly for a few minutes.

    EEMA:' [...]
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    Posted: April 17, 2009, 4:01pm EDT

  • ok, i lied

    Number of comments: 1
    Things I'm currently coveting for my their birthday:*

    Magna Tiles - for 2 kids, I think we need a minimum of 100 pieces, which means divide by rent plus groceries times nursery tuition minus clothing = bank account $0. Happy birthday to us.

    Lego - not Duplo,' [...]
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    Posted: April 14, 2009, 4:08pm EDT

  • now i'm going to have nightmares

    Number of comments: 1
    From behind me in the car: *click*

    is that noise what I think it is?

    ALEPH: [brightly] Zayde presses this button to open my buckle!

    yes. yes it is.

    My still-2-year-old now knows how to unbuckle his own car seat.

    And I thought the [...]
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    Posted: April 11, 2009, 11:44pm EDT

  • make that an awwwwwwww

    Number of comments: 3
    Scene: Trying to cook for shabbat without children underfoot. NotMary Poppins is here for expressly that reason, but is not... shall we say... all that effective. Aleph has been in and out of the kitchen every 5 minutes.

    ALEPH: [running in again] Eema, Bet says he's not gonna be' [...]
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    Posted: April 03, 2009, 4:57pm EDT

  • oops. is my AAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIGH showing?

    Number of comments: 0


    ALEPH: Eema, why did you say [exasperated sighing noise]?


    (Is my AAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIGH showing?) [...]
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    Posted: April 02, 2009, 9:10pm EDT

  • noted, your majesty

    Number of comments: 2
    Scene: Bet wakes up crying from his nap. Snuggles on my shoulder, rubbing snot all over me in the process. When he pulls away he notices puzzling wet spots on my shirt.

    BET: This doesn't look too good. [swiping ineffectually] Eema, clean it.

    ***

    Scene: College pizza' [...]
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    Posted: April 01, 2009, 12:21am EDT

  • send help

    Number of comments: 3
    Things you don't want to hear behind your back, part 2:

    "I peed in the refrigerator!"' [...]
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    Posted: March 28, 2009, 8:54pm EDT

  • advanced twin parenting, very very advanced

    Number of comments: 3
    I could just refer you to The Dad's post on this subject, but I don't think I've completely lost my power of speech. Yet.

    Toilet training two toddlers at once must be THE most nerve-wracking experience I've had since... wait, are you peeing??? No? OK then.

    What [...]
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    Posted: March 25, 2009, 10:24pm EDT

  • remedial twin parenting, part ii

    Number of comments: 3
    Took both kids to supermarket!

    The logistics took me a while - actually, it's surprising how much of twin parenting is just struggling with logistics. I still remember my aunt's first try at taking them for a walk, one day when she came over to let me nap. She [...]
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    Posted: March 23, 2009, 12:17pm EDT

  • a poem in the afternoon

    Number of comments: 3
    The boys are jumping on our bed, their (and my) favorite way of shaking off the post-nap cranky. Luckily one of the beds is king-size, so it's a plenty large enough trampoline for two small boys. (Un?)luckily it's also ready to be thrown out, so a little more abuse makes [...]
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    Posted: March 19, 2009, 9:13am EDT

  • some kind of help is the kind of help we all can do without

    Number of comments: 0
    Scene: Aleph is sitting on one Ikea stool and has his feet on the other.

    BET: [crying] I want to sit on one too!

    ALEPH: Oh! I know what you can use.

    [runs out, comes back in with tricycle.]

    BET: No, I don't want that!
    [...]
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    Posted: March 17, 2009, 1:02pm EDT

  • mistakes were made, etc.

    Number of comments: 2
    Yeah, okay, you knew it wasn't the last post.

    I'm not writing this to beat myself up for the way I did things when the babies were little. These are not things I can really blame myself for. Sometimes I had no choice; sometimes I didn't know any' [...]
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    Posted: March 16, 2009, 1:23am EDT

  • toy story

    Number of comments: 5
    A neighbor who is nearing grandmotherhood said to me recently, "I hear it's hard to find toys nowadays without a lot of loud noises and flashing lights." I looked at her, puzzled. I had no idea what she was talking about.

    Then something occurred to me.

    "Oh. You'" [...]
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    Posted: March 15, 2009, 1:57am EDT

  • remedial twin parenting

    Number of comments: 3
    Next on the list of basic things that terrified me, but most twin moms probably mastered years ago: I took the kids out for pizza tonight. Just me. By myself. We all seem to have survived, unless letting Bet eat a bowl of macaroni & cheese larger than his head [...]
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    Posted: March 13, 2009, 12:34am EDT

  • purim: toddler edition

    Number of comments: 0
    LANCE: So what was the queen's name?

    ALEPH: Vashti.

    LANCE: And what did Achashveirosh want her to do?

    ALEPH: Dance for his friends.

    LANCE: What did she say?

    ALEPH: She said no.

    LANCE: So what did Achashveirosh say?

    ALEPH: "I don't like the" [...]
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    Posted: March 10, 2009, 11:14pm EDT

  • snapshot: a year ago january

    Number of comments: 4
    We're at the grandparents'. The boys are still nursing but crazy about their solid food, too. I don't want them to see and beg for the fresh strawberries I'm slicing into my bowl of cereal, so I'm doing it up on the high counter.

    I think the boys are' [...]
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    Posted: March 09, 2009, 2:51am EDT

  • oedipus bet

    Number of comments: 2
    It's going to be kind of sad / frightening when Bet decides to turn his loverboy powers on someone other than me.

    ***

    Scene: at the dinner table.

    BET: Eema, I want your hand.

    EEMA: I can't hold your hand while we're eating, Bet. But I' [...]
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    Posted: March 06, 2009, 1:13am EST

  • i'm sorry, HAL

    Number of comments: 1
    Scene: I'm trying to send an uncharacteristically important email while Aleph is leaning on my arm / crying in my ear for a video. As usual, it's not clear whether he's upset because I'm not giving him what he wants, or because I'm engaged with the computer anything instead of' [...]
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    Posted: March 03, 2009, 2:25pm EST

  • criblog: you are sooooo immature

    Number of comments: 2
    BET: [kicking the side of his crib]

    ALEPH: Bet, please don't do that.

    BET: I want to.

    ALEPH: But I don't like it.

    BET: I want to.

    ALEPH: All right, you can do it for two more minutes, but then I need you to stop.
    [...]
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    Posted: March 01, 2009, 9:53pm EST

  • nine things

    Number of comments: 2
    Most of these have been emailed to one commenter or another, but I should probably put them out there for accuracy's sake.

    1) Only Aleph had colic. However, one baby with colic needs attention 100% of the time. When there are two babies, your choices are (a) never pick' [...]
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    Posted: March 01, 2009, 2:05am EST

  • i give up

    Number of comments: 5
    I've been trying to write this entry all week, but I don't think it's going to happen. I can't defend explain why Jody's advice should mean so much to a mother of twins. Not without sounding either self-pitying, or guilty. And I've had enough of both.

    To be [...]
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    Posted: February 23, 2009, 3:20pm EST

  • double or nothing

    Number of comments: 2
    So we're trying to decide whether I take the kids to Family Event tomorrow solo. I feel like I might as well not be there; I'll spend half of said Family Event pushing a double stroller back and forth in hopes of inducing Naps, and the other half trying to [...]
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    Posted: February 21, 2009, 11:07pm EST

  • it doesn't get better than this

    Number of comments: 2
    Sitting on my lap, Bet is playing his favorite combination of Eskimo-kissing and Twister, wherein we try to touch corresponding parts of our faces to each other. Both of us are giggling more and more as he goes on.

    He starts with the classics:
    nose to nose
    mouth to [...]
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    Posted: February 19, 2009, 1:02am EST

  • twinks*

    Number of comments: 6
    * borrowed from Emmie (of Better Make It a Double), I think.

    I don't have too many brilliant solutions for wrangling twins, being that my usual solution was "find a second pair of hands." But I figured, few as they are, I'd start putting them down here. Feel free [...]
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    Posted: February 18, 2009, 11:12am EST

  • also, is your refrigerator running?

    Number of comments: 1
    Scene: Bet is talking to his grandfather on the phone. I am dying of laughter.

    BET: Saba, how are you feeling?

    SABA: I'm feeling fine!

    BET: Animals.

    SABA: [startled] What?

    BET: Saba... are you thinking about animals?

    SABA. Oh. Okay, sure.

    BET: Saba...' [...]
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    Posted: February 17, 2009, 9:32pm EST

  • and who taught you the word 'section', anyway?

    Number of comments: 3
    Scene: The boys are playing their current favorite game, entitled "Hunting for Dimples," which involves running up and down the hallway with flashlights yelling "I found a dimple!" "I found another dimple!" Apparently inspired by the day I tried unsuccessfully to find studs under the drywall.

    ALEPH: You have [...]
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    Posted: February 17, 2009, 2:26am EST

  • file under: information i'm sure you don't need

    Number of comments: 7
    Speaking of eczema, I've never been told this by a medical professional, but I read it on an eczema website and therefore I KNOW IT'S TRUE: it's best to keep Aleph in 100% cotton at all times. His skin does seem to be of the variety that reacts to being' [...]
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    Posted: February 16, 2009, 12:12pm EST

  • luckily, today was ALREADY bath day

    Number of comments: 1
    Things you don't want to hear when you're putting the first boy on the potty, with the second boy & potty waiting behind your back:

    BET: It's a hat!

    They don't make 'em with seatbelts, do they?' [...]
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    Posted: February 12, 2009, 12:39pm EST

  • Dammit, Jody, you have to ...

    Number of comments: 0
    Dammit, Jody, you have to stop making me cry.

    Sniffle. [...]
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    Posted: February 11, 2009, 8:31pm EST

  • criblog: my teddy bear can beat up your teddy bear

    Number of comments: 0
    Overheard in deadly serious tones.

    ALEPH: Big Pooh has to get him, because he's the biggest.

    BET: Blue Bear is also big.

    ALEPH: Blue Bear is a little big... but not as big as Big Pooh.

    It took me a while to figure this out, but' [...]
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    Posted: February 11, 2009, 12:12am EST

  • let's play "i have pollen allergies too"

    Number of comments: 2
    OK, it was (comically) pathetic before, but now it's just starting to seem unfair.

    So Aleph has food allergies (not to mention eczema. and asthma.) So we don't cook with nuts or mustard. So he still gets an occasional rash around his mouth the source of which [...]
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    Posted: February 10, 2009, 3:59pm EST

  • let's play "i have food allergies"

    Number of comments: 1
    Scene: Aleph is poring over a tiny-printed synagogue newsletter.

    EEMA: What are you reading, Aleph?

    ALEPH: I have to make sure there's no nuts in these in-dree-dients.' [...]
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    Posted: February 09, 2009, 1:17am EST

  • cops: the toddler episode

    Number of comments: 0
    Sigh. When Bet started rewriting happier endings for all his stories [and then Little Bear FOUND his hat, and it fit just right!], I knew this was coming. It's such a fine line between fiction and... bald faced lies.

    No, Officer, I don't have any poop cocaine in [...]
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    Posted: February 09, 2009, 12:50am EST

  • it'll be anarchy!

    Number of comments: 1
    ALEPH: [yelling] No no no no no Bet! You can't do that!

    MARY POPPINS: Aleph, I don't like the way you're talking to your brother. Please don't tell Bet what to do.

    ALEPH: [paraphrase; it was kind of jumbled, but I caught the key words] How about if [...]
     | Rate | Archive
    Posted: February 04, 2009, 11:39pm EST

  • Betisms*

    Number of comments: 3
    * hmmm. I think I might have stolen this from Uberimma. Though of course she would have called them Barakisms or Iyyarisms.

    Man, I'm going to be pretty sad when Bet stops calling the futon the "futime."

    Others favorites he's already losing:
    rhinoferos
    torteghini
    chikmunk

    Aleph [...]
     | Rate | Archive
    Posted: February 03, 2009, 5:40pm EST

  • i want to be your personal stalker

    Number of comments: 0
    I think it's fair to say the boys are still recovering from my trip to Israel.

    EEMA: I have to get dressed, I'll be right back. Lance, can you hang out with Aleph for a minute?

    ALEPH: [bawling] nonononononono

    EEMA: Aleph, I'll be right back! Abba is' [...]
     | Rate | Archive
    Posted: February 02, 2009, 10:24pm EST

  • absolutely the last post i'll ever write about breastfeeding twins. maybe.

    Number of comments: 6
    For the record, we didn't make it as long as Cass, but longer than I ever dreamed after the rough patches we went through. We nursed until 23 months. I was aiming for a full 2 years, but in the end I decided to wean them for my birthday,' [...]
     | Rate | Archive
    Posted: January 30, 2009, 2:22am EST
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