If I see another sneaky chef book I might scream. A sneaky chef book is one of the new crop of recipe books in which you hide yummy delicious greens and beta-carotenes by a method of blending pureeing and other various schemes so that your kids don’t even know they [...]
I’m talking to Donovan about the various Easter Egg hunts that we will be attending this year when he says,
“Right but where’s the big one?”
I’m thinking, spoiled much? The glow in the dark one isn’t good enough, the church playground one not large enough? I never got to attend more [...]
I couldn’t wait to get back to normal because I thought this week was anything but.
I mean I was at a funeral facing a pastor I hadn’t seen in thirty years and let’s just say I haven’t been religious about attending church services; a childhood crush that dated back [...]
A friend just had a baby. Her name is Carmella. I am one among millions of people who love a baby fresh out of the old cooker, except when they are mine then I’m a toddler kind of gal. I appreciate a little give and take. I like pretending to [...]
Day one, 7:47 a.m.: Donovan starts crying when Mike leaves us at the station. He says he’s not too sad though because he knows God will be with and bless his father. This would make total sense if we went to church every week but he hasn’t been to church [...]
Donovan and I are going to the Big Apple for four days beginning Friday. I asked Beau if he wanted to come too but he acted like he’d rather eat the Big Apple then visit it with D and me.
I thought perhaps D might be the perfect companion; but [...]
I have a suggestion: When your teenager asks you to do something, do it.
I don’t mean when he says, “Can you buy me the new Blackberry Pearl?”
The answer to that is, “No.”
“Can you take me to Costa Rica for spring break?”
Again, “No.”
Or, “Can you call my history teacher and tell [...]
Today my little sprite came home with a smile the size of the Hoover Dam.
“Mama, guess what,” he chirped. “Blankety-Blank said he DID want to be my friend.”
“Oh, I’m so glad Honey.”
“He said just make sure I don’t tell anyone else because the other boys don’t like me. So as [...]
Donovan had an assignment last weekend. It was to construct a trap to put on his desk Monday morning to catch a leprechaun.
“Oh, that sounds like fun,” I thought, and so Sunday evening we got together some eye catching shiny trinkets, some green paints and pens, some double-sided tape and [...]
My littlest son Donovan is a fibber. It sounds cute. It’s not, although sometimes I snicker behind my back as I worry about his moral conduct.
Beau, however, told two lies his entire life while under the age of ten. After that I stopped keeping count but even at sixteen he’s [...]
I’m at the gym waiting to get in the kid’s room which is packed to the gills as it is want to do on the third consecutive rainy day. Tensions are a bit high as parents wait to get their workout on and kids wait to get their Wii or [...]
Top ten annoying teenage habits
1) Leaving wet towel on floor for days at a time until it smells like something that crawled out from under six days of snow, in other words dank to the d …ank.
2) Eating all your food. Stop eating all my food. I come home from [...]
Ok. Let’s start with this.
I did break your antique clock with the boy with the riding crop. It was me who dropped your favorite bottle of expensive perfume and replaced it with a bottle of Love’s Baby Soft hoping you wouldn’t notice. And yes, I made those marks on the [...]
Ok
Let’s start with this.
I did break your antique clock with the boy with the riding crop. It was me who dropped your favorite bottle of expensive perfume and replaced it with a bottle of Love’s Baby Soft hoping you wouldn’t notice and yes I made those marks on [...]
In the arsenal of parental tools there are varied and useful weapons. The trick to the arsenal is knowing when to use what weapon. Call them tricks, call them tools of the trade, call them necessary, call them what you will, but call upon them with caution for they are [...]
In the arsenal of parental tools there are varied and a useful weapons. The trick to the arsenal is knowing when to use what weapon. Call them tricks, call them tools of the trade, call them necessary, call them what you will, but call upon them with caution for they [...]
In the arsenal of parental tools there are varied and useful weapons. The trick to the arsenal is knowing when to use what weapon. Call them tricks, call them tools of the trade, call them necessary, call them what you will, but call upon them with caution for they are [...]
Donovan cried at school, today. He didn’t get pushed over on the playground. He didn’t have someone steal his lunch money. He didn’t fail a reading test or lose his best friend.
But he did learn about Hankerham Lincoln. Yes, I said Hankerham but I’m just reporting here, and it’s [...]
Donovan cried at school, today. He didn’t get pushed over on the playground. He didn’t have someone steal his lunch money. He didn’t fail a reading test or lose his best friend.
But he did learn about Hankerham Lincoln. Yes, I said Hankerham but I’m just reporting here, and it’s [...]
I am a snow grinch. Don’t like it, never have, never will. It’s too late too change and since I live in Richmond Virginia, I don’t even really feel like I have to. I mean seriously it snows like once a decade here and even I can fake it for [...]
I am a snow grinch. Don’t like it, never have, never will. It’s too late too change and since I live in Richmond Virginia, I don’t even really feel like I have to. I mean seriously it snows like once a decade here and even I can fake it for [...]
Today is the one-year anniversary of the start of my blog. Who knew I could write three times a week for an entire year about my family? Who knew I would have that much to say? Who knew ANYONE besides my mother and sister-in-law and three close friends would read [...]
Today is the one-year anniversary of the start of my blog. Who knew I could write three times a week for an entire year about my family? Who knew I would have that much to say? Who knew ANYONE besides my mother and sister-in-law and three close friends would read [...]
Today is the one-year anniversary of the start of my blog. Who knew I could write three times a week for an entire year about my family? Who knew I would have that much to say? Who knew ANYONE besides my mother and sister-in-law and three close friends would read [...]
I watched a show called “Toddlers and Tiaras” or “Littlest Beauties” or some crap like that. I turned it on while Donovan was in the room because I really just wanted to see the reaction of someone truly honest, someone unjaded by jadedness. Three minutes into it I turned to [...]
I watched a show called “Toddlers and Tiaras” or “Littlest Beauties” or some crap like that. I turned it on while Donovan was in the room because I really just wanted to see the reaction of someone truly honest, someone unjaded by jadedness. Three minutes into it I turned to [...]
I watched a show called “Toddlers and Tiaras” or “Littlest Beauties” or some crap like that. I turned it on while Donovan was in the room because I really just wanted to see the reaction of someone truly honest, someone unjaded by jadedness. Three minutes into it I turned to [...]
A college teacher was telling me that despite the fact that her students were brilliant they couldn’t navigate their way around a paper bag full of life skills.
And I began to think. How have I prepared Beau for the world at large?
He can make an egg, which is [...]
A college teacher was telling me that despite the fact that her students were brilliant they couldn’t navigate their way around a paper bag full of life skills.
And I began to think, “How have I prepared Beau for the world at large?“
He can make an egg, which is more than [...]
A college teacher was telling me that despite the fact that her students were brilliant they couldn’t navigate their way around a paper bag full of life skills.
And I began to think, “How have I prepared Beau for the world at large?“
He can make an egg, which is more than [...]
Some of you might remember the day we got our son back.
It was nine weeks after the first quarter grades and grounding went into effect. All electronic devices (and the list is long) were terminated until further notice. Sound harsh? I suppose in today’s electronically charged world it [...]
Some of you might remember the day we got our son back.
It was nine weeks after the first quarter grades and grounding went into effect. All electronic devices (and the list is long) were terminated until further notice. Sound harsh? I suppose in today’s electronically charged world it [...]
In this house we believe in the Tooth Fairy, Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny and the general goodness of people. Ok, Ok, so mostly just D believes in that- the rest of us are a bit more cynical then naïve and fresh-faced D but when he lost a tooth this [...]
In this house we believe in the Tooth Fairy, Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny and the general goodness of people. Ok, Ok, so mostly just D believes in that- the rest of us are a bit more cynical then naïve and fresh-faced D but when he lost a tooth this [...]
Today as I was driving I felt a huge shadow in my rear view. I glanced back to see a black shiny monster of an SUV and peering over its wheel the size of a inner tube was a tiny coiffed soccer mom who amazingly enough was waving a Starbucks [...]
Today as I was driving I felt a huge shadow in my rear view. I glanced back to see a black shiny monster of an SUV and peering over its wheel the size of a inner tube was a tiny coiffed soccer mom who amazingly enough was waving a Starbucks [...]
Over the years I have been called a helicopter mom- behind my back, yes but a moniker I most definitely deserved. Beau’s nickname for me through his formative years was indeed Eagle Eye. The boy couldn’t get away with nothing and hopefully still can’t (by the way if any of [...]
Over the years I have been called a helicopter mom- behind my back, yes but a moniker I most definitely deserved. Beau’s nickname for me through his formative years was indeed Eagle Eye. The boy couldn’t get away with nothing and hopefully still can’t (by the way if any of [...]
Valentines- the Hallmark of Holidays- went down like this, this year. I know it hasn’t even occurred but it’s been squashed before it ever even happened.
Me: Umm honey I was thinking about picking up a shift on Valentines Day.
Honey: WHHHATT? Working on Valentines Day?
Me: Well, darling, [...]
Knitting is all the craze these days. O.K. Maybe it’s not but I know like twelve people who are doing it and at my age, twelve can constitute a craze. I mean they got like six women together on a weeknight sans kiddies and husbands to knit: CRAZE.
I wanted [...]
I can see the meeting now.
So you’re looking to implant some embryos?
Yes sir I only have six kids so far. I don’t have a job and I’ve been out of work for years but I’m thinking six or more would fit the bill.
Yes obviously you need more, [...]
Every year as Valentines rolls around people get frantic. Men can’t decide if they have been dating long enough to buy, married long enough that they don’t have to buy or if they have any idea what to buy. Women are not so much frantic as to what they will [...]
Every year as Valentine’s rolls around people get frantic. Men can’t decide if they have been dating long enough to buy, married long enough that they don’t have to buy or if they have any idea what to buy. Women are not so much frantic as to what they will [...]
I reminisce about the good old days. I do it often. Get up on my pulpit and preach about when kids had morals and knew how to work. I like to refer to myself as “old school”. I’m not so sure why because in the good old days when I [...]
Ten thousand shiny silver paperclips does not make for much of a covering on a 5’6, 120 pound thirty- three year old mother of two but when my friend Tony asked me to model his daring design in a fashion show, I said yes. The reasons behind that “yes” are [...]
When my Dad died, I used to pray that I could live long enough to see Beau grow up. And then he did. Then I prayed I’d live long enough to be happily married. And then I met Mike. Then I would pray to have just one more baby. And [...]
When my Dad died, I used to pray that I could live long enough to see Beau grow up. And then he did. Then I prayed I’d live long enough to be happily married. And then I met Mike. Then I would pray to have just one more baby. And [...]
If you want something done- ask a busy person- just don’t ask me. I am currently in the middle of my winter vacations, which is a euphemism for “I’ve got no work from January 1st till about roughly Feb 28th. This year instead of looking and feeling wild-eyed, desperate and [...]
Reunited and it feels so good.
She went to high school in Egypt and I in my mother’s basement. She rendezvoused with poets and lawyers while I passed time with skate punks and bleached out blondes with multiple piercings. She listened to things like Phillip Glass and I loved [...]
On Friday night Donovan and I went to the Snowball Dance. It was his first dance and of course required an outfit change. When he came down stairs in his Most Dominant Player shirt with his Redskins hat cocked completely to the side I knew we were in for a [...]
When my son told me we would have time to waste before going to Laser Tag, I suggested a trip to Coppolas. Then I opened my checkbook and realized that though we could afford to eat out, our server could count on about fifty cents and we were definitely sharing [...]
I’m at Gold’s trying to get buff when a woman I know from the playground comes up to me. She says she’s working out to get rid of her baby fat. I ask her how old her baby is. I can see beneath her blushing cheeks that she is considering [...]
I’m at Gold’s trying to get buff when a woman I know from the playground comes up to me. She says she’s working out to get rid of her baby fat. I ask her how old her baby is. I can see beneath her blushing cheeks that she is considering [...]
It seems that one member of my immediate family has been actually reading my blogs and to my surprise it’s not Donovan…it’s Beau. I began to wonder when he remarked on things I was sure I hadn’t discussed at the dinner table but pretty sure I had let half the [...]
Dear grocery store you and I have to have a word or two or twelve whatever it takes. I’m at my wits end. I’ve stopped buying name brand. I only allow one treat in the basket per week I mean unless you count chocolate bars as a treat because technically [...]
A brave man in my husband’s firehouse sent me an email entitled “Men are Happier”. I think he meant to send it to my husband but it was addressed to all men and women with a sense of humor or who can handle it. I enjoy a good giggle at [...]
I have always said the kindest thing I ever did for my children was allow them to be normal but that was back when I thought normal was normal. Normal is now something else.
Normal in 2009 means:
Your teenager whines incessantly and the only one who rivals him is [...]
When Beau asked me about sex, I got out a medical dictionary. When he asked me about death, we went to a funeral. I never fostered images like the easter bunny, the tooth fairy or for that matter …Santa. I mean just the sheer logistics of the lie were enough [...]
When Beau asked me about sex, I got out a medical dictionary. When he asked me about death, we went to a funeral. I never fostered images like the easter bunny, the tooth fairy or for that matter …Santa. I mean just the sheer logistics of the lie were enough [...]
Every year for the past ten years as the New Year comes close I make out what I call my life list. I have saved them for more then ten years and when I deeply reflect on where I have come and where I am going…...I have to giggle. For [...]
Here’s a Holiday hint. Do not wait until the last minute to do your Christams shopping. It can be a very expensive proposition. A friend of mine and I’m not giving any names but it starts with an M and rhymes with Lorgan found herself in a Walgreen’s at 11:30 [...]
In this life there are givers and receivers. It’s no shame to admit you are one or the other, it just is. For example, my husband is a fine man. A kind and generous man. A loving husband and father man; but that man would rather get a present ANY [...]
I wrote down everything my first son said; any tiny tidbit of cuteness and quirkiness were recorded. I have in fact in my Word documents, four pages single-spaced of things Beau said that I wanted to remember. Things like
“The sun made me do it”, when he stepped on a frog [...]
I wrote down everything my first son said; any tiny tidbit of cuteness and quirkiness were recorded. I have in fact in my Word documents, four pages single-spaced of things Beau said that I wanted to remember. Things like
“The sun made me do it”, when he stepped on a frog [...]
Tonight in CVS I saw a woman being held hostage by her four year old. He would not leave aisle nine and the dancing snowman no matter how she cajoled, bargained or begged. She knew she was at the point of bodily removal, complete utter meltdown and total embarrassment complete [...]
Donovan will be six this December and I have yet to give him what might be called a birthday party by any kindergartner’s standards. I mean the kind with guests not related to you, a big fancy cake and presents that aren’t wrapped in a plastic bag or newspaper. This [...]
On November 16th I joined the Face book Group ”Buy Nothing Day”, with the full intention of boycotting the biggest shopping day of the year. I wouldn’t be part of that day of homage to American Shoppers, Black Friday. I didn’t want nothing to do with it. I was more [...]
Funny I should come across this Lifetime movie the very day I write a blog about getting old(er). Funny the movie should be called Flirting with Forty. Even funnier the actress playing forty is actually more like fifty (I like that part) but I am totally calling double standard. How [...]
Funny I should come across this Lifetime movie the very day I write a blog about getting old(er). Funny the movie should be called Flirting with Forty. Even funnier the actress playing forty is actually more like fifty (I like that part) but I am totally calling double standard. How [...]
I may be closing in on forty but I am not going down without a fight. In the past few days in a whirlwind of holiday parties, Christmas spirit and long hours at work and the gym I have come to a realization about youth, vivacity, energy and keeping up [...]
I may be closing in on forty but I am not going down without a fight. In the past few days in a whirlwind of holiday parties, Christmas spirit and long hours at work and the gym I have come to a realization about youth, vivacity, energy and keeping up [...]
A few weeks ago I was free on a Friday night. I know, jaw to the floor, who knows how it happened; universes collided and the husband was home, the teen was not needing to be carted to and fro, and I wasn’t dog tired before it got dark. I [...]
A few weeks ago I was free on a Friday night. I know, jaw to the floor, who knows how it happened; universes collided and the husband was home, the teen was not needing to be carted to and fro, and I wasn’t dog tired before it got dark. I [...]
Just here to say that, “Because I said so”, is a perfectly legitimate parenting phrase.
Somewhere along the way, some pop psychologist told all us parents that we had to explain our every move. I’m here to tell you…that’s not true. You DO NOT have to justify your reasoning [...]
Just here to say that, “Because I said so”, is a perfectly legitimate parenting phrase.
Somewhere along the way, some pop psychologist told all us parents that we had to explain our every move. I’m here to tell you…that’s not true. You DO NOT have to justify your reasoning [...]
Yesterday was a good day. Yesterday I found out I no longer have skin cancer. Yesterday was a scary day. Yesterday my oldest son turned sixteen and asked me to make a trip to the DMV. Though I no longer fear the surgeon’s scalpel, I feel the fear of the [...]
Yesterday was a good day. Yesterday I found out I no longer have skin cancer. Yesterday was a scary day. Yesterday my oldest son turned sixteen and asked me to make a trip to the DMV. Though I no longer fear the surgeon’s scalpel, I feel the fear of the [...]
I’m sitting outside a class I’ve got a D in. I’m in a ripped pair of Vans, a sweatshirt with SHORTIE emblazoned on the front, eight nasty stitches under my eye, two pink stripes in my hair and a purse with two pockets half hanging off the front. I thought [...]
I’m sitting outside a class I’ve got a D in. I’m in a ripped pair of Vans, a sweatshirt with SHORTIE emblazoned on the front, eight nasty stitches under my eye, two pink stripes in my hair and a purse with two pockets half hanging off the front. I thought [...]
My family started with my oldest brother Tom and ended with me, the youngest and only daughter. There is something unexplainable about the bond between siblings. It is either an easy going relationship like the one Tom and I shared or it is a more tenuous relationship such as the [...]
My family started with my oldest brother Tom and ended with me, the youngest and only daughter. There is something unexplainable about the bond between siblings. It is either an easy going relationship like the one Tom and I shared or it is a more tenuous relationship such as the [...]
One of my favorite election ad campaigns was when Barack Obama was talking about education and he said to turn off the television and read to your kids. Is change really that simple? Does change begin that easily? Yes, yes it does. There are some things beyond the scope of [...]
One of my favorite election ad campaigns was when Barack Obama was talking about education and he said to turn off the television and read to your kids. Is change really that simple? Does change begin that easily? Yes, yes it does. There are some things beyond the scope of [...]
Today is my dad’s birthday, but he died fifteen years ago. If he was alive today I would probably be giving him the newest James Taylor c.d. or a new pair of size eleven and a half Nikes.
Although, times have changed and our presents have gotten a little [...]
Today is my dad’s birthday, but he died fifteen years ago. If he was alive today I would probably be giving him the newest James Taylor c.d. or a new pair of size eleven and a half Nikes.
Although, times have changed and our presents have gotten a little [...]
I always wanted to say I had a kid in high school until I actually did. Applying to high schools in Richmond is equivalent to getting your wisdom teeth pulled while watching one more presidential election debate: painful people, painful. Beau is now in tenth grade but I remember the [...]
I always wanted to say I had a kid in high school until I actually did. Applying to high schools in Richmond is equivalent to getting your wisdom teeth pulled while watching one more presidential election debate: painful people, painful. Beau is now in tenth grade but I remember the [...]
You know you’re a grown-up when:
The stitches on your face aren’t from a burly catfight but are from a minor bout with skin cancer.
The doctor gives you after-care instructions and you not only follow them but you ask in depth questions as well.
Halloween ends when the streetlights go out, and [...]
This goes out to all the Republicans, Democrats, and Independents in the house: Let’s play nice.
It’s the day before we have a new President. It has been intense these past couple of months and the two parties seem to agree on pretty much …nothing. Well except the fact that [...]
So I am at the doctors today. It’s Halloween and I’m getting my face carved. Just kidding not that bad, hopefully just getting cancer free this time when I say to the doctor.
“Does the local anesthesia cause your face to break out.”?
“No, or at least in twenty one years [...]
So I am at the doctors today. It’s Halloween and I’m getting my face carved. Just kidding not that bad, hopefully just getting cancer free this time when I say to the doctor.
“Does the local anesthesia cause your face to break out.”?
“No, or at least in twenty one years [...]
I was an ugly girl. One of those semi- buck toothed, bowl hair cut wearing, features looking like a blob of pressed out clay, elbows akimbo, knees all a knobby type of gals. As a teenager I was more of the same, just bigger.
I had really pretty friends. Boys [...]
I was an ugly girl. One of those semi- buck toothed, bowl hair cut wearing, features looking like a blob of pressed out clay, elbows akimbo, knees all a knobby type of gals. As a teenager I was more of the same, just bigger.
I had really pretty friends. Boys [...]
At a local coffee shop two moms were in line laughing it up about all the oxymorons of motherhood beginning with something current: Halloween.
They have a point.
We encourage kids to dress up as scary monsters, blood and bandages not excluded, traipse around the neighborhood knocking on the doors [...]
At a local coffee shop two moms were in line laughing it up about all the oxymorons of motherhood beginning with something current: Halloween.
They have a point.
We encourage kids to dress up as scary monsters, blood and bandages not excluded, traipse around the neighborhood knocking on the doors [...]
So, apparently most skin damage occurs while you are a teenager. This begins to make sense to me as I vividly remember lying out on the roof of my two-story house on a bed of tinfoil deep-frying myself in Crisco.
This image led to a few other teenage flashbacks and [...]
So, apparently most skin damage occurs while you are a teenager. This begins to make sense to me as I vividly remember lying out on the roof of my two-story house on a bed of tinfoil deep-frying myself in Crisco.
This image led to a few other teenage flashbacks and [...]
So I had to serve lunch to twenty people today with six black stitches in my face. I could have cared less about their lunch and perhaps it showed as I flung their lamb at them and left their coffee cups half empty…..just kidding. Even in a bad mood I [...]
So I had to serve lunch to twenty people today with six black stitches in my face. I could have cared less about their lunch and perhaps it showed as I flung their lamb at them and left their coffee cups half empty…..just kidding. Even in a bad mood I [...]
I keep getting emails chastising me for being petty or not understanding what someone might have been going through at the time I chose to write about them. And first let me say that, “Bravo you are right.” I KNOW there is an exception to every rule and yes the [...]
